Dear Daughter — Be True to Yourself, Live Your Life, and Ignore the Old Fool
Find out who you are and what you want in life. Never let anyone else tell you how to live! This is your life, your world!
Dear daughter,
Living a good life can be tricky, especially if you don’t follow your heart and listen to yourself. One of the hardest things in life is to be who we genuinely are and be faithful to our authentic selves. To allow ourselves to live the life we really want to live. To even desire what we authentically desire and not what others want for us.
It’s a confusing world out there, and the most confusing part is the one between our ears.
Our minds are full of voices, ideas, and expectations that aren’t ours. Staying faithful to ourselves is almost impossible when we are overwhelmed and bombarded by other people’s ideas.
Who are you? Do you know?
You must first know who you are before you can stand up to the ideas, desires, and pressures of everyone around you. Tune yourself to your inner voice. Do some soul-searching. Get to know your true self. Choose your values and priorities carefully, and don’t let anyone force you to compromise on them.
I will do my best to teach you to think with your head and allow your heart to guide you, no matter what other people, including your mother and I, think about your ideas.
It still won’t be easy. To this day, I get lost in the expectations and wants of others, losing myself in the process, which only results in disappointment and sorrow.
We can only fake being someone we are not for so long before it all falls apart.
Things in life change constantly.
As I write this letter, it’s 2020, and the whole world seems to have descended into madness. Everything has been halted for a questionable pandemic. There are riots everywhere. People are turning on each other. Desperation and anger fill the air. One can almost taste that worse is yet to come before it gets any better.
We had it all figured out, your mother and I, and then this happened out of nowhere. All our plans went out the window. The money is gone, and the income dried up overnight just as we bring a new life into this world — you.
I should be shaking in my boots, terrified and worried, but somehow, I am not. We are not. The world may have gone insane, and life has gotten a lot more challenging, but there is hope.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel. I can see it shining in the distance. That light is you, my darling.
I don’t know how things will work out, but don’t you worry. We will make it as a family no matter what comes our way. We will overcome anything the world throws at us as long as we understand, support, and love each other.
I don’t know what tomorrow will bring.
I don’t know what the world will look like when you grow up. I honestly have no idea, and I don’t pretend to. All I know for sure is that it will be different. Whatever I teach you, whatever I believe today, will most likely be invalidated with time.
- So how can I prepare you for the world you will inhabit, dear one?
- How do I guide you when there are so many unknowns in the future?
- How can I tell you what is right when I don’t know it myself?
I don’t know what the future will bring, but more importantly, I don’t yet know you.
- Who will you be?
- What will you like?
- Will you have artistic tendencies?
- Will you be a scholar, engineer, athlete, or politician?
- Will you be an adventurous spirit or prefer safety and comfort?
Even if I could see the future of the world, that wouldn’t be enough. Because I cannot possibly know what you will like or who you will become.
What will make your heart sing, and what will make you dread waking up in the morning? These things are essential for a happy life, but they are yours to find out, not mine.
We may all be somewhat equal, but we are not the same.
We all think we know what’s best for others, but we don’t know anything! We don’t see the world in the same light. We have completely different ideas, beliefs, and understandings. We all live in different universes, yet we must find a way to coexist.
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” — Attributed to Albert Einstein
I love that quote. It’s a great reminder that we are all different, and if we judge others by our standards, ideas, and beliefs, we are doing them a disservice.
I will show you the world, my darling, and all the different sides of it. I will encourage you to explore conflicting points of view and help you understand that there is no one right way for everyone. I will open your eyes and your mind.
You will then determine what you like, believe, and wish to experience.
- I want to teach you how to decide for yourself what is right and wrong and choose your own path. I want you to think with your head.
- I am not interested in defining the truth for you and telling you what to think and want! Only how to think. Never what!
It’s your life and your perspective.
Swim my little fish in the richest ocean of your choosing, and if I ever make you climb a tree, remind me of the error of my ways.
I am only human and somewhat opinionated at that. I can’t even imagine the smartypants I will become as I get older. I feel sorry for your already.
My darling daughter, never fear to go against my wishes or question my views. I ask that you always feel free to challenge me and let us explore different perspectives in an open dialogue.
Since I am only human, I will no doubt still have my ideas of what’s best for you, and for the first part of your life, I will insist that you abide by a few of those. But as you get older, I hope I will have the patience, understanding, and trust to let you spread your wings and fly wherever your heart will guide you. All I can promise is that I will do my best.
If you see me going back on these words, by all means, do remind and correct me.
Or better yet, simply ignore me, the silly old fool who no longer understands your world. No previous generation ever did. Know that I do it with love, even if I don’t know what I’m talking about.
Swim, my little fish, swim in the oceans of your choosing, or climb your favorite tree. I don’t care. As long as you are happy, so am I.
Love, Dad.
