June 16, 2019
It’s Father’s Day today. I feel lucky to be here with you. I feel lucky to be here with your Grandpa Michael. I feel lucky.
These holidays are totally made up, but that’s not just the fault of corporations. Life has gotten so busy and self-centered that it takes a reminder of what’s important with the peer pressure to take it into consideration, to make sure that people pay attention to what matters. That makes me sad.
In the spirit of being pensive, though, I find myself with thoughts of Pops, my dad, co-mingled with the thoughts of being here today. It makes me wonder what fatherhood, and parenting at large, are.
On your 4th birthday, I closed that letter noting:
parenting is half learning how to help while half unlearning how to hold on tight
I still think this is one of the truths of parenting, but it’s the parent-centric one. As I was thinking of this, though, I realized there’s another point of view that’s super important — yours.
Now, I can’t presume to know your point of view yet (more on that in a second), but I can imagine it from my own. Let me summarize it.
A parent’s most important attribute is to be steady
Your life is going to constantly change, but the one thing I want you to count on, rely upon, and turn to is your mom and I. I know we won’t always have the best answer, won’t always know the best thing to do, or even always have the same advice, but we’ll always be there.
As parents, we have lots of different functions throughout your development and maturation. We’ll be your coach, your mentor, your doctor, your teacher, your friend, your consoler, your pillow, your shoulder, and countless other things. The only thing these things have in common is our love and persistence.
No matter what, somehow, some way, we’ll be there.
Now, before I go, I wanted to save the most wonderful gift you have made for me yet. You came home from school with this little book about dad that I wanted to keep a memory of :)