A Letter to My (Probably) Straight Son
Written on the occasion of National Coming Out Day
Dear Beckett,
I’ve been told that today is National Coming Out Day, so I thought I’d write you a letter to let you know that I am so proud of you and that I will always love and support you, whatever you decide to do or be when you grow up.
I know it’s likely too soon to open this can of worms and you’re probably not yet ready to talk about it, but your daddy and I have long suspected that you are (probably) straight, and I wanted to let you know that we’re OK with that. In fact, we’re more than OK with that. We will always love you unconditionally, whether you are straight or gay or bisexual or transgender or apricot.
As you get older, some people might tell you that being straight is a lifestyle choice, that you can choose who you are attracted to and who you love. IMHO, being straight is as much a lifestyle choice as “choosing” to be innately creative or naturally open-minded. I’m pretty sure that we are born the way that we are born, and being straight doesn’t automatically mean you will lose your spirit of compassion and curiosity, despite what some people might believe.
Some people might even go as far as saying that being straight will limit your career opportunities or cause others to immediately assume that you have bad taste. Ignore these naysayers. Straight people can do most things that LGBT people do, including being police officers, designers, stylists, and writers. Maybe it will take a little more time for you to hone your good taste, but nowadays there are entire industries created to help straight people find their good taste.
Even if being straight was a choice, who really cares? There are plenty of kind, successful, well-adjusted straight people, and many of them are quite nice! Truth is, most straight people are completely ordinary and don’t go around flaunting their straightness or shoving their straightness down everybody’s throats. Those who flaunt and shove usually have something to hide. You might be surprised at who identifies as straight these days.
As you go through life, you’ll discover that some of your friends will come out as straight, too, and that’s cool with your daddy and me. Many of my best friends are straight, and I’ve never held it against them. What people choose to do in the privacy of their own homes is none of my beeswax, so who am I to judge?
One day when you fall in love, the girl who wins your affections will be the luckiest girl in the world because she found a boy as sweet and funny and smart as you. It’s possible that you will fall in love with another boy, and he, too, would be incredibly lucky to have you. Either way, I hope you will use your grandmother’s wedding ring when you propose to her (or to him).
The world today is a very different place than it was when I was your age, and it will only get better because there are incredible people like you—straight or gay—in the world.
You’re the best son a dad and a daddy could ever dream of calling our own, and we are so lucky to be your fathers. You make us proud every single day, just because you are you.
Love, dad
Originally published on Lazy Dad’s Guide to Everything.
