Education, Vocabulary, and Terminology with LGBTQueer-ies
Cis or Cisgender— What Is It?
It has nothing to do with sexual orientation.
There are enough genders out there that no one can seem to agree on the actual number of options. Depending on which website or medical professional you ask, you can get answers from a dozen or upwards of a hundred.
Having a transgender child is the reason I continue to learn as much as I possibly can about the gender spectrum. I will probably never understand them all (especially if that number is closer to the hundred-mark). And honestly, my comprehension of all the possibilities doesn’t really matter, although my acceptance does.
Since my son came out, I suppose I’ve taken for granted all the new terminology and vocabulary I’ve learned regarding the LGBTQ community. I’ve always assumed everyone knows much more than I do. But during a recent conversation, I realized many people don’t know what ‘cis' means. So although I probably will never be an expert on all the genders we now know exist, I can certainly help others understand what cisgender means.
So for the sake of understanding what cisgender means and why it is an important term, this article will focus on the differences between cisgender and transgender. This is not meant to exclude any other gender out there, but only to keep the explanation of cisgender simple to comprehend.
What It Means
If you’re cisgender, or cis, your gender corresponds with your birth sex. In other words, if you were born with a penis and identify as male, you are a cisgender male or cis-man. If you were born with a vagina and identify as female, you are a cisgender female or cis-woman. It’s that simple.
So why does this term have so much confusion surrounding it?
I think the confusion is partially due to how the definitions of sex and gender have evolved. Gender refers to how a person identifies, while sex refers to a person’s physical anatomy or biological makeup (or their sex at birth).
Sex also refers to the act of sexual intercourse. Because sexuality has only recently become more acceptable to talk about, many people (especially those within the last few generations) have considered it a taboo topic of discussion. I believe this is why sex — when referring to biological sex — was replaced with the term gender in the past. Over time the two terms — sex and gender — became synonymous. This was of course only within the public community. Medical professionals have never used the two terms synonymously.
Society’s embarrassment pertaining to sex is the reason there is any confusion at all between sexual orientation and gender identity. So now, many of us have to relearn these definitions in order to understand where our loved ones are coming from.
“Your gender identity is about who you are, how you feel, the sex that you feel yourself to be. Sexual orientation is who you’re attracted to.” — Chaz Bono
Trans and cis are basically opposite in meaning. Both are Latin prefixes. One meaning “across from” or “on the other side of” (trans), and the other meaning “on this side of” (cis). So as the term transgender became more widely used, the term cisgender emerged in our language.
Why the Term Cisgender is Important
There are some cisgender people who don’t understand why we need a term such as cisgender in the first place. The reason it’s an important word to our language is that its existence immediately stops any abnormal connotation of what it means to be transgender. In other words, without the term cisgender we continue with the assumption that not being transgender is what is acceptable and normal. Without cisgender, we assume transgender is abnormal.
The point here is that people who are transgender, cisgender, or any other gender are all within ‘normal.’ There is no abnormal because gender is a spectrum and all people are equal. We’re all human.
Binary Choices Are a Thing of the Past
Many of us get hung up on the idea that it’s always one or the other. Black or white. Gay or straight. Male or female. Yet we know there are many different shades of color. Many different sexualities out there. And now many different genders as well.
There used to be only two common options when considering gender: male or female — the old-fashioned, out-dated binary choices. But now we know this binary was born from referencing biological sex — although that is not completely accurate either. There are those who are biologically intersex — people who are born with ambiguous genitalia, possibly appearing to be female on the outside but having typical male anatomy on the inside for instance.
The point is that the terms sex and gender are not interchangeable anymore — assuming they ever really were. Vocabulary and terminology change because human communication evolves over time. The more we learn about humanity and the world, the more we need new and evolved ways of expressing ourselves and that which surrounds us.
The Take-Away
Being cisgender, transgender or one of the other possible genders only speaks to a person’s gender identity which is how they experience their gender internally. It is part of their core sense of self. Because of this, a person’s gender identity should never be assumed based on their outward appearance or anatomy. A person’s gender has nothing to do with what may or may not be in their pants.
Gender — like sexuality — is a spectrum. And similar to sexuality, gender identity can develop or unfold over time based on the individual’s internal self — it is fluid. The more we explore ourselves emotionally, mentally, and physically the closer we get to becoming authentic individuals. As human beings, we should allow each other the grace that is needed to realize our own personal development and realization.
Regardless of our individual gender identity, we are all human, and we are all equal. Opening our minds to understanding new terminology and verbiage allows each of us to understand one another better. This understanding fosters empathy, which encourages equality for all human beings.
Zada Kent is co-founder of LGBTQueer-ies where the focus is on education to foster understanding, acceptance, and equality of all human beings, and proud parent to her young adult transgender son. For all parents of transgender kids here are 10 Questions Every Parent Should Ask Their Transgender Teen.
