How to Change Your Transgender Kid’s Legal Name
General guidelines with resources for the specific rules for every state in the U.S.
By the age of thirteen, my transgender child was living as a boy. We had stopped using his birth name at his request and instead used a more appropriate nickname that he chose along with masculine pronouns such as he/him/his.
A couple of years later my son settled on a new name that fit him perfectly. Unfortunately, his state I.D. didn’t reflect this new name. His school report card and other letters sent home were reminders that not everyone identified him correctly. And doctor’s visits were laden with misgendering pronouns and his birth name.
Stepping away from home, family, and friends was often filled with hurtful reminders of my son not living his most authentic life. So when he turned sixteen we paid for his legal name change.
General Guidelines
Unfortunately, there is not one single set of rules to change your child’s legal name. Every state is different. But there are some similarities and that is what these guidelines will cover.
Contact your county court.
In most states, you will need to start the process by submitting a petition (read: filling out several forms) to the court asking for your child’s name to be legally changed. This of course needs to be done with a court where you live — typically your county court.
Note: Some counties and/or states require the individual to have been a resident for at least one year.
Filing Fees
It will cost you to file your petition for a name change. In most states, the fee ranges from $150 to $200. Sometimes there are additional fees for anything needing to be notarized.
In Ohio, we picked up the necessary packet of forms from our county court. After filling out the forms, we returned them along with a notarized copy of my son’s original birth certificate to the county court’s office and paid the filing fees.
The Local Newspaper
Before a hearing can be scheduled, most states require the applicant to publish a notice in the local newspaper stating the upcoming name change. Exceptions can be made if the applicant’s personal safety is at stake.
It will cost to post an announcement in the newspaper. In my son’s case the fee was included in the filing fees we paid the court. Check with your own county courthouse to determine if you need to pay the newspaper separately or not.
The Hearing
Your child’s hearing can take up to four months to schedule in some states. My son’s court date was less than sixty days after filing although we never physically had to appear in court.
We received my son’s final documentation in our mailbox one week prior to our court date. I verified with the clerk that everything was legally changed ahead of schedule and that it was no longer necessary for us to keep our court date.
After speaking with other families who filed for a legal name change for their transgender children, I’ve learned our experience is somewhat common. For those who did physically go to court, the judge wanted to personally hear from their child. Although I’m sure it happens, I haven’t personally spoken with anyone whose transgender child was not granted their legal name change.
Details To Consider That May Influence the Above Guidelines
Usually, parents need to be in agreement.
If both parents cannot agree on the name change there are usually extra steps involved in order to move forward, although there are some instances where nothing will change due to custody decisions. It’s best to contact your local courthouse for details or your personal lawyer if this detail affects your situation.
Your child is younger than twelve or thirteen.
Your child’s age can be a factor when obtaining a legal name change. It all depends on what state you live in so make sure you let the court know your child’s age when you first contact them.
Your child is fourteen or older.
Some states require any kid fourteen-years-old and up to complete a form of consent to the name change. Check with your county court to see if this pertains to your family.
Your child has criminal charges.
Depending on the nature of the offense, applicants with prior criminal convictions may not be eligible for a legal name change.
Update Everything
Once you receive the legal documents notifying you that your child’s new name is official, it’s time to make all their documentation accurately reflect this.
Birth Certificate
You’ll need to contact the county health department of the state in which your child was born and received their original birth certificate. There will be a small fee to obtain the new certificate and you will need to do this in person. They will want to see the legal documentation granting your child’s name change.
Social Security Card
It is absolutely necessary to tell Social Security your child’s name has changed. Getting a corrected card is free, but you must do it in person. You cannot apply for this new card online.
Not notifying Social Security of a name change can impact any future benefits as well as cause income tax issues for your child.
Driver’s License or State ID
Changing the name on your ID is usually a fairly simple procedure that is easily done at your county’s Bureau of Motor Vehicles. You’ll need to show the legal name change documentation along with the new birth certificate.
But if you’re considering changing the gender marker on your child’s ID as well (and your state allows you to do so), you might want to wait. It costs to get an updated state ID. So you might want to save yourself an additional fee by changing both your child’s name and gender marker at the same time.
Passport
With your child’s new updated state identification card and birth certificate, you will be able to procure a passport or passcard for your transgender child that will reflect the new name by following the federal guidelines. Our local post office employee helped us submit the proper forms to obtain my son’s passcard.
Schools, Doctors’ Offices, Insurance cards
These were probably the easiest to update for us. In all three instances, I simply had to submit my son’s new state ID.
I am in no way a legal authority. I’m simply a mom who helped her transgender son change his legal identification to more appropriately match his true identity.
If you would like more specific information the National Center for Transgender Equality has an amazing resource for anyone living in the United States. You can simply input your state and they will give you the specific guidelines to change your transgender child’s name and/or documentation based on where you live.
Here are 10 Questions Every Parent Should Ask Their Transgender Teen. Zada Kent is founder of LGBTQueer-ies & proud parent to her transgender son.
