It’s Time for the Collective Healing of the Firstborns
We’ve been the family airbag for too long…it’s time for a change
“Did you know about this?” I heard that tone in my sister’s voice, the one that indicates she’s really mad, and I felt grateful her ire wasn’t directed at me. It was her oldest three boys who were in the crosshairs.
What followed was a typical family moment — a mom putting her foot down over some bad behavior exhibited by her children. Yet in that very typical moment, one that I had witnessed (and been a part of with my own mother) many times before, something very atypical happened: I saw something I’ve never witnessed before.
All three of my nephews had been involved in this latest debacle, but my sister was speaking directly to her eldest, 12-year-old Ben. She would occasionally address the younger two, but mostly, she expressed her feelings and laid out her expectations directly to Ben.
As her voice rose slightly when she explained the source of her frustration, anger, and disappointment, I saw what I can only describe as a wave of energy hurtling its way toward Ben, one that seemed to hit him full force, while 10-year-old Finn got splashed as the wave hit his older brother, and 8-year-old Kai was barely jostled by a baby swell.
