The love of my life.
Rest in Peace — Jennifer Sedney
I don’t really know where to start or how to even go about telling you our story. If this is all over the place it is because I am still trying to process how I feel. This is probably one of the hardest things I will ever write. One of the most important people I cared for on this world has passed on.
On Christmas Day Jennifer Sedney suffered from a brain aneurysm and did not make it through. Even though I am told it was quick and painless I cannot imagine what it felt like and how scared she must of been.
Jen or as her friends called her Jenseds taught me more in 4 years then anyone has taught me before. She showed me what it was like to be loved so much by someone. Even though we had broken up a year and a half ago I could not get her out of my head and she always was in my heart. I would have dreams of her and there were some days when I would get home wishing she would be in my room waiting for me.
Jen and I met in January 2010 at my apartment. Her friend had brought her over to see what living in Hoboken New Jersey was all about. We slowly became friends and 2 months later we started dating seriously. I remember I had asked her to be my girlfriend at Spring Lounge after we had gone out to pizza around the corner. She made me so happy.
I have never put so much effort into coming up with awesome dates for anyone else because to me the effort was so worth it for her. We had gone ice skating, did a 4 mile race in central park, did the warrior dash, went to stupid Ridleys Believe It or Not Mesuem in Times Square, I took her to Wicked, We saw concerts together. No matter what it was that we did she made it so much fun.
One day she told me
“I am so glad that if we don’t work out that I gave you that New York Experience and showed you what it was like to live in the city”.
She is my New York Experience and gave me the fairytale story that most people never have.
I will never forget Jennifer. She will forever have a piece of my heart. You don’t get a chance to get back that person that showed you what it was like to be in love. We were at the park in Hoboken where she turned to me with tears one day saying
“I think I am falling in love with you”.
I really cannot express how much this girl meant to me. I am so heartbroken that it feels like the day we split up. I have had a pit in my stomach since I found out.
Around my birthday this year all I really cared about was to get an email from her wishing me a happy birthday. Of course she sent me one a day early.
I am not really sure what my future holds or where I will be but I do know that Jen only wanted me to be happy and always wished the best for me. I used to have that comfort that there was one person who really cared no matter what. I know she does still care but its not the same. I will not get that email anymore and it saddens me so much. The rest of my life will be dedicated to her. I am not sure if I have much left here in the New York Area minus my friends and family. I was always considering going elsewhere but there was this hope deep down that kept me here in case she wanted to come back and pick it up where we left off.
The moral of the story and what we can all learn from this is that no matter what we do, cherish the friends and loved ones you have. No one knows whats going to happen in the future. Life is short and fragile. There is no point in holding grudges.
I really regret the last year and wish I could of spent it with her. When we broke up, I cared so much for her that I tried to forget about her and what she had done to me. She showed me what love was and showed me what it was to be the man/adult I am today. I will never forget her and can pray that she is in heaven and god is holding on to her tight in a better place than here.
One day I will meet her again but until then I am going to dedicate my life to the small things that make me happy.
Rest In Peace Jennifer Sedney. I have never felt this way about anyone before. You showed me the world and opened up my eyes. I will miss you forever. I am so sorry for everything. I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU!!
