The Importance of Sacrifice
I used to feel so detached from the stories of sacrifice in the Bible. It seemed so barbaric, even dark sometimes. My perspective tended to focus on God and why he would ask people to present dead animals, or even their children in the case of Abraham, as sacrifices. What I believe now, through experience, is that those sacrifices had very little to do with God and what he wanted. They were more about the people offering them, giving them a chance to lay down the things that were important or necessary for their survival on a literal fire and watch it burn. Why? To display a trust that God was more than enough to meet their every need.
Here recently God asked me to sacrifice something. Now this isn’t your typical give up sugar for 20 days or don’t eat meat for the month of January, this was a good old fashioned sacrifice of a material possession, one that I was quite fond of too. I was sitting in a chair outside in the wilderness doing my devotional and as clear as day, without words or conscious thought I knew He was asking IF I would be willing to sacrifice this item. “That can’t be you God” I thought, but the feeling persisted. Suddenly I was confronted with the reality, if it’s that hard for me to give it up then He’s probably asking me to sacrifice it.
The story of the rich young ruler comes to mind.
17 As He was setting out on a journey, a man ran up to Him and knelt before Him, and asked Him, “Good Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” 18 And Jesus said to him, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good except God alone. 19 You know the commandments, ‘Do not murder, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not defraud, Honor your father and mother.’” 20 And he said to Him, “Teacher, I have kept all these things from my youth up.” 21 Looking at him, Jesus felt a love for him and said to him, “One thing you lack: go and sell all you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.” 22 But at these words [a]he was saddened, and he went away grieving, for he was one who owned much property.
23 And Jesus, looking around, *said to His disciples, “How hard it will be for those who are wealthy to enter the kingdom of God!” 24 The disciples were amazed at His words. But Jesus *answered again and *said to them, “Children, how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! 25 It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.” 26 They were even more astonished and said to Him, “[b]Then who can be saved?” 27 Looking at them, Jesus *said, “With people it is impossible, but not with God; for all things are possible with God.” Mark 10:17–27
Most read this passage and believe that Jesus was telling this guy that in order to be saved a person must sell all of their possessions and give the money to the poor. But, that’s not what he’s saying at all.
He was pointing out what this man truly wanted was wealth and possessions, even more than he wanted eternal life. So, the wall or barricade that was keeping him from truly inheriting the Kindgom of God was his selfish ambition. Jesus further clarifies the condition of this man’s heart by not only telling him to sell all that he has, but also to give away the money he makes from selling it. Money was far too valuable to him, he might be willing to sell the possessions and find something to do with the profit, but never would he be willing to truly give away the thing he loved the most.
So God exposed just how much I was in love with this thing, in much the same way. It was painful, but I was also thankful that he was shining light into the darkness of my heart. I could have explained the feeling away and essentially walk away like the rich young ruler did, or I could act on the feeling in faith knowing that even if it wasn’t God telling me to give it up the decision would be honored by Him because of my motive. I knew this thing occupied way too much of my time. I knew that I liked it a little too much. I knew how much I was fighting with the idea of leaving it behind on a rock when I went back inside.
So many things went through my mind; “well maybe if I sacrifice it He’ll do a miracle to bring it back into my life!” Immediately I knew my motive for sacrificing it would be wrong if I was banking on getting it back. I had to, I wanted to, be willing to give it up even if I didn’t think I was going to get it back. So, after a bit more wrestling I placed it atop a large rock nearby, turned the other direction and walked away.
I wish that is where the story ended.
It was morning when I left it outside on the rock. I had the rest of the day to think about it and question wether or not I was truly hearing God’s voice, only to quickly remember that even if I hadn’t he would still honor the sacrifice. Back and forth my mind went all night, it was hard to focus on the teaching that was happening at the retreat I was attending. Several times the teaching offered confirmation that i was doing the right thing, with the right heart. Soon it was time for bed. Now, I thought, it was gone for good.
Morning came. It was still dark outside and the moment my eyes opened guess what was in my mind. Yep, my sacrifice. I tried to have an honest conversation with God about it, but in reality all I was willing to hear was that it was okay for me to go back outside and reclaim it. Eventually I gave in, accepting my own thoughts and desires as the voice of God. I marched out to the rock, grabbed it and headed back inside. I didn’t feel good about the decision at all. In fact I started realizing that I felt so much better when I thought it was gone forever. I liked the version of myself that was willing to sacrifice anything and everything to my God, holding nothing back for myself. That’s the me I want to be. But, I kept it anyway.
During breakfast I was having a conversation with a good friend and fellow retreat attendee. With my mind still fighting with itself I started a conversation with him about sacrifice. I told him that I believed that God had asked me to sacrifice something but I wasn’t sure. I told him the whole story without revealing what it was that I was sacrificing. His response, “well, if God asked me to sacrifice my…” and he named the exact object that God had asked me to sacrifice. I knew for sure now, God was using this experience to point out an unhealthy love of a material possession. That was it, this thing was going back on the rock.
I asked my friend to come with me as I returned the offering to its rightful position on the rock. I was still anxious as he was quick to point out, taking every last minute I could before layout it back down on the cold rock. I did lay it down though and we proceeded to sit together out in the cold doing our devotional for that day together.
I don’t know how to summarize this experience just yet, it’s still too real and personal for me. I do know that He’s truly blessed my decision to sacrifice something very meaningful. It hasn’t magically shown back up on my doorstep 1,000 miles away from where I left it and the money I lost by giving it up hasn’t magically appeared in my bank account. But the object is replaced with the blessing of knowing that I was willing to give up something valuable for Him and I expected nothing in return.
What’s the thing that, should God ask you to sacrifice it, you would have great anxiety? There it is. Now if your mind is flooded with anxiety at the thought of having to get rid of it, will you consider wether or not it’s a sacrifice that would help bring your heart closer to the heart of God? I promise you, you won’t regret it.
