1 Simple Trick to Deal with Pain That Nobody Tells You

BY CAMMI PHAM — First appeared on my personal blog

The next time you are in pain, give yourself 5 minutes. Scream. Cry. Do whatever you want.

Then stop at the 5 minute mark.

And start turning that negative energy into actions.

Some days, we are sad.

Another day, we get mad.

Other days, we feel jealous.

Then there are times we miss someone.

There are moments when we want to hurt people. We feel so much hate.

Other times, we feel depressed and think the world is over.

These are common feelings that can show up daily or when we least expect them. They create negative energy in our lives.

People often say we need to eliminate the negative energy. There are entire schools of thought about negativity and how best to release it from our lives.

But the truth is, without pain there is no happiness. Everything will feel the same. Nobody will be able to feel anything.

Real life is not a self-help book that tells what you want to hear for the sake of driving book sales.

Sometimes, life sucks. It just does.

You don’t have to think positive. Positive thinking often distracts you from dealing with your pain.

If you don’t deal with your negative energy, you will still carry it around everywhere.

Be selfish. Deal with your feelings in an unconventional way.

Convert feelings into actions.

Embrace the negative.

  • If you are sad, start sharing. Tell people what’s making you feel sad. Maybe your feelings and stories will show other people that they are not alone. And you’ll find out you’re not alone either.
  • If you miss someone, start writing about how he inspires you. Maybe it will become the next trending article.
  • If you hate someone, pick up his favorite book. Maybe it will help you understand him better.
  • If you are jealous or angry, learn a skill that your competitor is better at than you. Maybe one day you will surpass him.
  • If you want to kill yourself, do a random act of kindness. You will realize that many people still need you.

Let your negative energy inspire you into doing something you enjoy.

Don’t think, just do it. Just convert all your pain into a new form.

Write a book. Paint a painting. Compose a song. Read a book. Cook some food. Go to the gym. Climb a mountain. Build a startup. Create some magic.

Do something you like. Don’t think about it, just do it.

When you are focusing on doing something, pain will convert from one form to another.

If Therese Malfatti von Rohrenbach zu Dezza didn’t reject Beethoven’s proposal and marry someone else, we wouldn’t have Für Elise.

You may not be Beethoven, but that doesn’t mean your pain can’t help you create something wonderful.

Someone’s pain can be another person’s treasure.

Don’t think. Just do something.


This is the message I wrote to my newsletter list with this article. Some people wrote me back and said it was helpful. Suicidal thoughts are common. Many of us had it at some point in our lives. I find writing can help me organizing my thoughts and feelings. If you want someone to talk to, feel free to email me anytime at [email protected].

People often ask me how I write all my posts and manage to get them trended. Today I am going to share with you the truth about all of them.

I don’t write and hope people will like/hate my work. I just share my life experiences. If something works for me, it doesn’t mean it will work for you. I hope you can learn from my mistakes. I hope my work will make you think. I hope you will learn, unlearn, and relearn.

I almost never write a non-work-related article when I am happy. Behind every blog post, there is a story. Sometime I cried at 3 am in the morning to write the next trending article. When I felt like the only solution was killing myself, I wrote a blog post. The next day, when I read all the sweet comments you guys left behind, I realized I wasn’t alone. My life is a mess and my work is the proof.

If I am not scared to press the publish button, I haven’t poured my heart into it. Sometime it was about a friend I lost. Another time it’s about the lost love that I will never see again. Every post has a real life story and only a few people could understand it.


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