The ugly side of learning
As NOT seen on TV or Facebook
A tale of two basketball players
With seconds left on the clock, the energy in the arena is palpable. The tangled mess of players below fight for control of the ball.
Suddenly, one player surges toward the hoop with the ball in his hand. The clock moves ominously toward the final second while a defensive player appears from nowhere to block the advance.
Twisting skillfully our hero leaps into the air and the ball sinks through the hoop with satisfying snap of the net. The buzzer sounds.
The crowd leaps to their feet roaring with delight.
Somewhere on the other side of the world, in a worn out basketball court a child takes their first shot. Missing the graffiti-covered backboard, the ball sails off the court into the dusty bushes.
Undeterred, our eager beginner retrieves the ball and shoots again. A little closer this time, the ball probably would have brushed the net if it hadn’t been torn off years ago.
As the hours move forward, our little friend continues shooting — mostly missing but slowly improving with every failure.
So which of these two basketball players are more skilled?
Only time will tell.
The dark secret of excellence
When we look at others, we see the victorious moments of their lives.
We see the photoshopped, autotuned, edited versions of their crowning achievements.
We don’t see the years of blood, sweat, and tears leading up to that victory.
We don’t see the hundreds of failures along the way.
Everyone starts at the bottom.
When we’re in the beginning stages of learning a new skill, we make mistakes. It’s just part of the learning process.
The problem comes when we let those mistakes hold us back.
Too often, that embarrassment leads to resignation, and we give up on learning rather than suffer the self-imposed humiliation of a couple errors.
We forget that even superstars started as ordinary people.
What if failure is good?
We see others — on TV, on YouTube, on Facebook — at the high points of their lives.
And then we compare the genuine version of ourselves with the gilded version of others.
But what if we didn’t?
What if we gave ourselves the freedom to fail?
What if we gave ourselves the freedom to learn?
Nate Desmond is a growth professional who spends his free time reading amazing books and training parkour. He writes frequently about growth marketing on his blog and lifestyle thoughts on Medium.
