3 Lessons Life Taught Me that Changed Me Forever
On happiness, balance and getting things done ❤
Our Happiness is Borne of Gratitude
We should understand that we are all part of a much bigger story. If we just focus on our personal pains and joys— we miss the bigger picture. Life naturally gives a human many more opportunities to observe it than to design it.
There is always something worthy of wonder in the universe.
It is unfair to the benevolent source that created something as beautiful as the cosmos, if we ignore everything lovely about it just because we cannot leave our eternal footprint upon it.
Because we feel guilty about ‘not doing enough’ — as one little human walking on this small planet with billions of other humans.
All of us are just a sprinkle of life in the stardust of the universe. Our life right here and now is what matters most, far more than worrying about any legacy we leave behind.
We should pay attention. We are lucky to be sentient observers of the universe. Feeling grateful can give us greater happiness than we can foresee.
The key is to notice the little miracles.
It can be everything from a starlit sky to a snow white pebble that floats in a river.
It can be a beautiful scientific formula or a wild sprint through the forest with your friends, or even just the familiar and comforting sound of your favourite songs.
Remember the real smiles of your loved ones and hear the sound of the shimmering rainfall in your backyard. Remember the ice-cream outings you used to have with your parents as a kid, and remember the playful fights you got into with your siblings.
There are countless lovely little things life has given you. It is only a matter of opening your eyes to notice them.
Let’s count some more.
Your favourite pizza place. Your favourite people. Your favourite books. That goofy, nonsensical one hour conversation you had with your best friend. The little puppy you observed stumbling adorably by the sidewalk.
The warmth that goes through you when someone you love hugs you tight.
These golden-silver linings are scattered throughout your life, always there to be noticed. They remind you that your worth does not lie in your success.
You aren’t announced as a good human being only if you manage to be achieving something. It is also enough to just live with gratitude.
You can enjoy life as a human being and observe the small miracles in it. To pay attention is more important first.
Gratitude and peace will give you more lasting happiness than worldly success will ever have the power to.
Your self esteem centre must never be your work, because then you would mold everything in your world to revolve around it.
You would hold your self esteem hostage to the results of your career, making yourself miserable in the process. That creates a toxic work-centered identity. You would be like a boat floating on the current of constant anxieties and your emotional health would be wholly dependent on how well your work is going. That is nothing but bad for you.
Often times, feeling sad is not even our fault. Sometimes it is just a season that has to pass. Many times, life is not meant to be the list of achievements or tale of legends that the world tells us that it should be.
It can be something much better and more magical.
Your self worth should be in your soul, in the character that you have. An eternal and changeless core.
In that you are kind, intelligent, or sweet or gracious. Humble and funny. Light hearted and strong willed. That you can notice the rainbow after the rain diminishes. That you love your family. That you are doing the best you can right now, even if things are not going your way.
Know that they will one day. That time might come sooner than you think.
For the readers who are unsure of themselves and want to discover the strengths of their personas better, I have a recommendation. There is this wonderful online resource called the 16personalities.com and their science is based on Carl Jung, Catherine and Isabel Myers’ theories about human psychology. They provide a free and accurate personality assessment test that has helped many people around the world. I recommend it to those looking to understand themselves a little better!
In the end, your faith in yourself should reside eternally within you— oblivious to the constant change life brings. Something permanent that grounds you in a constantly transforming world.
Your gratitude for your life and yourself will give you the happiness that you are always looking for.
Respect Your Human Needs. They Gift You Balance.
Even if nothing is happening, I have learnt over time that we only need four basic things to survive. I am observing our medical needs in this section as well. Everything else can come under the ‘want’ pile.
I have learnt this one real truth through my experiences with clinical depression:
As long as you can eat, drink, sleep and shower — life goes on.
Things slowly get better even without your conscious effort.
You live to see a new day and you progress to see life get a little better on its own. Just eat food, drink water, sleep and shower. Just get through.
That’s honestly what surviving day to day comes down to. This sounds basic but it’s shocking how many of us cannot do it well. We suffer consequences of great magnitude that build up over time if we ignore these physical health needs.
We really have to focus on these basics and get through life if it feels like we can do nothing else. It will pass. Even if we are too excited and have too much to do, it is these same core basics that will ground us.
They have great power to help us feel stronger and better in a way nothing else can.
The Real Key to Resilient & Healthy Productivity
Once you feel emotionally stable and stronger, and once you are ready to start taking small steps, here’s my advice. This is the best working roadmap I have found for healthy productivity so far:
Take it one step per day.
And on the days you cannot that step, know that it’s okay to just be. Wait for the next day and enjoy today.
Focus on completing your physical health needs. Eat food, drink water, sleep and shower. Wait to get yourself to good health and emotional stability, and eventually then you will feel strong enough to take that first step. One step a day is all it takes. Decide what matters most to you.
Once you trust the ocean of your life and swim with the tide, you will discover that the universe rewards your trust. Be brave enough to love yourself and your life. Believe in yourself. ❤