Commiserating Over Corpses

(all pictures by Giovanni Hanson)

Life is longer than we think.

We come to this realization, hopefully sooner rather than later.
I’ve seen souls who have found their way at nineteen, others often far older, if they’re lucky, but so many never do at all.

I have come to this realization, and it has taught me two things;

1. Life is a choice, we choose to live every day that we are alive. We make that choice, because the alternative is permanent.
2. The only possessions we really have from this world that matter, are the bonds that we make. The friendships we form.

We made a bond at a young age, too young to know what we were doing and too ill prepared to face the world we were hidden from.

But we had to try, and try we did.

Seven years, like a seven minute cigarette break.

Seven years, like the seven pounds we both broke.

Two life rafts through the storm of life, only to drift away in the still waters.

And we kept our word, til’ death do us part.

You watched out for me, because of loyalty.
Loyalty to a fault, honesty to a fault, tough love to a fault.
I wish you the best, but I realized we should have never been married.
We know this, and we also know that we should be in each others lives.

A strange bond, ex-spouses, a knowing bond, an eternal bond.
A love toxic in close proximity, but magical in controlled doses.
Bursts of reunion.

You made me stronger.
You made me wiser.
You made me braver.
You made me happier.

So why did I push you away?

Was I sick? Was I scared?
Was I weak? Was I blind?

I was.

I was all of those things, and more.

You meet certain people in your life where you will never meet anyone like them ever again. This is true for you.

I show you myself and your bite is too cold.
I share my soul with you and your criticism sears.

You speak truth like fire,
Controlled can cause construction,
Chaos causes curses in need of cauterization.

But you speak truth, a version that others do not.
That, I will always hold in high regard.

You told me to go find my people, and that is what I am doing.
To go out and find the friends who were scattered. Cause connection.

You told me to let the old man have his castle.
To live my life for my happiness, not my hatred. Futile is destruction.

Life is not a movie, it has many movie moments but as soon as you stop thinking of you life that way you cannot move on.
Because watching movies is effortless, you ever try to make a movie?

I have seen so many endings to movies in my life.

I want to start making my own.

We will make our own,
and one day, yes,
we will have our White Stripes tribute band.

Happy Birthiversary, Amemus in via nostra.