It got me too,

I haven’t been writing for a number of reasons lately, I just haven’t really felt like it. No matter, I proved to myself that I could write.

But, obviously, the biggest reason I haven’t been writing is because I finally got hit with covid. And what a truly horrible experience this has been. Starting off with chest cold and head cold, leading to violently vomiting for about 24 hours, catching very little sleep where I could, trying to remain hydrated as much as possible, only able to have vegetable broth as sustenance, going stir crazy in my own disgusting house, and my mood cascading downward like snow from the Olympic Mountains.

To be honest, I’m not sure I ever wanted to write. Sometimes I do, it’s a good way of expressing emotion that I otherwise couldn’t. But I think what I wanted more than to write, was to be a writer, And that’s just not how it works.

I have a lot of ideas, but if I’m honest with myself the present moment of writing those ideas in a narrative structure, absolutely dissolves any desire I have to really see the writing through. Maybe that’s just inexperience? Maybe I should pursue something else.

I’ve always loved history. I love how history becomes a story in itself, a situation comes up, someone decides to try and solve the situation the best way they know how, consequences follow. That is our history and it fascinates me. It always has, more than writing…

But then again, life is still a journey, and the roads are still foggy.

“But the soup is getting cold,”

- Leonardo da Vinci’s last written words.