More Than You Know
(A poem for the loves of my life, too many to count.)
More than you know, you’re meaning to me,
Is beyond that of simple kin,
But if you are sure, you want to know me more,
Where should I begin?
We all take roads we choose in life,
Some harder than they seem,
At least that’s what I tell myself,
Lost in stories I believed.
Style of the meek, flavor of the week,
Making memories that decorate pages,
Breaking hearts, but taking names,
And placed in cardiac cages.
God invented hell to, eventually,
Keep his sheep in check,
God has never taken away sorrow,
But every sorrow, they respect.
Yes, I can live a life,
Yes, I can play the game,
But no, I am not having fun,
Traded fun for knowledge gained.
Praising misery and freedom,
Than being coerced, cornered, convinced,
That the only key to my happiness,
Is ignorance and bliss.
I may be scared of many things,
But never to see the truth.
Without the justification spewed,
By the excuses of the youth.
The youth in mind, immaturity,
Experienced only in growing old,
Fighting miserly intentions,
With honesty as my gold.
I am a coward, a careful coward,
A coward with a conscience,
A loving individual,
Who’s been hiding ever since.
There’s so much suffering around me,
I can hardly take a stand,
I feel it all and don’t get to choose,
I was never given that hand.
My mother lends the love that she can,
Which activates my pride,
I feel the weight of past and future,
She says I’m doing just fine.
If everyone fights their own inner battles,
Reinforcements can’t make it in time,
We are all tired, we are all hungry,
We have all lost morale inside.
How could I ask for the help of other,
When strength is often misunderstood,
Even therapists are out there, on the front lines,
Even counselors struggle with adulthood.
These are the thoughts the enter my head,
The lies I struggle not to sow,
And even then it’s just the tip of the iceberg,
It’s always more than you know.
