One Culture Difference I Have Noticed During My Time in America

Studying and living in another country is really a challenge for me and for other international students. We are facing some awkward problems such as communication barriers, lifestyle differences and, of course, culture shocks.

During the first day I arrived in UCSB, students here were all friendly, being willing to make friends with me. They shook hands with me and introduced themselves, saying that I can visit them during spare time. I was surprised by their warm welcome and thought I might really visit them one day for a party . In contrast, when I was in China, I even didn’t have chance to say hello to people living next door since everyone is obsessed with their own business without realizing the existence of other people. Also, Chinese people are shy so they don’t really want to show their welcome to other people, being afraid of awkwardness. Friendly people in America make me fell welcomed so I thought I would make a lot of close friends here.

However, things did not going well like I imagined.

As time went by, I gradually realized that shaking hands with warm smile and inviting you was just a greeting to people. They like to make new friends but, most of times, they prefer to go and play alone. When I first moved in to my dorm, a girl living up the floor called Jennings welcomed me and said I could have dinner with her the other day. I really took her words seriously, waiting her invitation for dinner. However, sometimes I found that she had dinner on her own but never invited me. In China, once I asked someone for dinner one day, I would keep my promise, inviting them soon. Then I asked my Californian roommate about this situation, she told me it is common that inviting people is actually a normal greeting. “You shouldn’t take it seriously,” said my roommate.

Also, for most of Chinese, we only have few close friends who form a little group. We would like to spend a lot of time with each other on the group instead of playing with anyone else or going to some parties in which we don’t have familiar friends. On the contrary, American people would like to make a lot of friends but they really don’t have many close ones. As a result, it is common for them to have hundreds of friends that they really don’t have any interaction with. With only one or two words, I can make a friend but I even don’t have their contact information.

This culture difference in ways of making friends really impressed me so I want to share it with other international students.