Talk, Talk! — Difficulties Met As An International Student
As an international student at UCSB, I have had many embarrassing difficulties here. For example, since I am not a native student, I have no clues what do other U.S. students mean by using some words that I know but it is clearly not the same meaning in their talks. More heartbrokenly, although they kindly explain to me sometimes, I still can’t understand due to the huge culture difference. Another thing that makes me feel uncomfortable is that the class size is too big at UCSB. The largest class size I have ever had is 40. When I was a senior three student in senior high school, the class size was so small that only 5 students were in the same class. I was totally not used to the class size in college. It increases the distance between professors and students, causing me to be more and more introvert when facing a large class, like the 800-students Economics lecture last quarter.
But what troubles me the most is communication. The first trouble is the way to say what I think. I come from a city that uses two different languages, Cantonese and Mandarin. Generally speaking, there are actually three languages in my mind when I want to speak. But these three languages have their unique pronunciations, orders of sentences, and even intonations (Cantonese has nine intonations, Mandarins has four, and English… I have no ideas). Therefore, I have a kind of mixed style of speaking when I use these languages. While I present my thoughts to others, words that are specific to a language are hard to use in another language. Most of the time I can just smile or laugh to cover up my embarrassments. But I am always willing to present my opinions in an unfamiliar language (using Mandarin can be unfamiliar too) with somebody as well.
Another communication embarrassment is pronunciation. I seldom choose to go to the restaurants in university center, not to mention the restaurants outside the campus. Because it is somewhat embarrassing for me to even think about the situation that I mispronounce the word. Sometimes the wrong pronunciation even leads the embarrassing words (the most common one is beach and bitch, I have no idea what is the difference so I try to avoid any chance that I need to use these words). Luckily, to prevent these potential mispronunciations, most restaurants give numbers in their dishes or meals, so I can directly point it out or just say the number. The most comfortable way to get some food without even talking is in the school dining commons. The only chance I need to speak to someone is when getting the deli. But people who serve this kind of dish nearly never speak to me.
However, even though I am facing these embarrassments in communications, I still trying to improve the situation. I will try to use “I want some potatoes and scrambled eggs” instead of “this, this, and that thank you!”, or keep pronounce some new words over and over and ask the one I speak to if I pronounce it in a correct way (Peter Giuliano!). Moreover, because my roommate is a U.S. citizen, I will ask her “how is your day?” and tell her about my day when we are in the dorm. I try to talk in a normal way and speed as I use Mandarin and Cantonese. My roommate is so kind to listen to my shabby English and she will not avoid difficult words in case I don’t understand. I learn a lot of culture differences and new words from her too. Practice makes perfect. I am confident that after using English more frequently, I can one day use it fluently as I use the other two languages.
