Once on a day, an hour, maybe a week, it doesn’t matter what kind of time it was that it happened, a blog of nothing, no appearance, no odor, no sound, no physical presence, stepped out into the world; an unrecognizable world that couldn’t see this spirit, but rather saw through it. There were things in that unrecognizable world that the blob could sense, but it didn’t understand. There with no form or presence wondered what should it become. It studied the unfamiliar world and it thought, I could become like the pieces of this building, this world, the pieces that make towers and great structures, a plank of wood, or brick, or a metal beam and I would be strong, sturdy, holding up the world around me. Then it wondered again. It could be like these other objects, which were like buildings, but grew into bright, beautiful creations. These were not inanimate, but living. I could be a tree or a blade of grass or a whole field. It could become the ocean and all of the things in it. It could become the sky and the birds, the snow and the rain, the boots, the planes, fire, corn. It could be anything. Finally it saw these strange things that were all over the world, nothing like anything else on the world. They had knowledge and abilities not held my anything else and so, finally, it decided to become one of them.
It entered the world as a young teenager with no gender and no idea about anything. It miraculously remembered clothes, although it was a mismatch of items, heavy items although the day was hot. Boots, bathrobe, winter hat and gloves, and a scarf. It appeared one day in a city not knowing what or who it was, just that it was. It came out into the world and for once it could be seen, it had a presence. It heard speaking and the speaking became words and it understood this world and what these things were.
In such joy it said, “I’m a person,” shouting for joy that it had finally found a home for itself in this world.
So it went to the grass and rolled in it, what it could have become. It ran to buildings and ran its fingers along their brick walls. It looked at the sky and thought, I could have become you, I could have become the clouds and the wind and the rain, but instead I’m a person. I know what all of these things are and they are all beautiful.
But, it didn’t know what it was. It had seen the world and all that was, but it had only seen it though its brief frame of existence. It had once barely a soul and now it was a thing and it had fixated on a teenage state.
The first thing it learned was hunger and thirst. It knew what water and food were, but it had no access to any amenities. It still thought the world was beautiful and it still ran in the streets until it knew heat and the sun. The magic was gone then for it was in the world and it now had to learn to live in the world. So hungry, hot, thirsty, it watched people’s lives, it followed them around. It saw a sign for restrooms and it knew what that meant. It saw a sign for a homeless shelter and it knew what it meant and went there.
There it found clothes and, although it had no fashion sense, it was given jeans and a tank top and tennis shoes. The teenager, clothed and housed, was encouraged to get a job, particularity at a place that made food, so the teenager did. The teenager stayed at the homeless shelter trying to understand what this world was really. It saw very quickly the difference between male and female, a difference it had forgotten to understand. It looked its body over and, though it lacked strong characteristics, it had a female form, but it didn’t know what to call itself. It watched the females and the males and it knew it was neither. It had forgotten to see to that. I could be both, it thought, but it was unsure so it stuck to the jeans and t-shirts.
One day at work it had got its food, paid minimum price for it, with a small dock in wages to it could eat, it saw a human of its age that did not fit into a gender. It had never seen a human that did not fit a gender before. So it sat down with the human, but it didn’t know what to talk about, just the basics. It could barely remember its own history now. Not having a mother or a father, just a teenager. It didn’t have a name; so it called itself Jack or sometimes Sam or Edison. Today it decided that it would be Aaron/Erin. It didn’t know there was a difference in spelling.
Naturally, it said, “Hi, I’m Aron, I work here.”
The person sitting across from it ran their hands through their bright purple hair and said nothing, just ate their food. They looked at Aron, ate their food, finally saying, “Hi, I’m Gabe.”
They sat and thought and it was awkward. Aron knew what awkwardness was, it had felt it before when it tried to talk to others. Not that it didn’t know how to deal with the feeling.
“I don’t know how long I’ve been a person, but it’s been a while. I live at the homeless shelter, I make food. That’s it, it’s okay. I make a small living.”
Gabe said, “You’re homeless?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh.”
It was awkward again. Aron didn’t know whether or not to ask Gabe if they were homeless, too, or what gender they were. It didn’t know if Gabe was a male or female’s name, but it didn’t ask because it was afraid.
It said, “Do you come by more often, it’s the first time I’ve seen you.”
Gabe said, “No, this is the first time I’ve ever been to this restaurant. I’m blogging and I’m trying a bunch of different burger joints. I hadn’t hit this one yet.”
“Does your burger fit your expectations?”
“No, it’s not bad, but it doesn’t fit my expectations.
Aron said, “I’ve never had anything better so it tastes like the best thing in the world. I’ve seen the world.”
Gabe looked at it and said, “Teenager, homeless shelter and you’ve seen the world?”
Aron thought for a minute and didn’t understand, so Gabe dropped it.
Finally, Gabe asked, “Do you want me to take you to a better burger joint?”
“You don’t have to, I mean I’m working here and I need the money so that’s it.”
Gabe said, “How about when you get off work?”
Aron looked at the clock. Once time was so incomprehensible to it. It still seemed so unreal. “I get off work at seven.”
It looked at the floor and back to the clock a couple of times before confirming. “Yes, seven.”
Gabe gave him a look, but didn’t press it. “Okay, I’ll stop by here. I’ll take you there.”
Aron went back into the kitchen to finish its shift. Gabe showed at 7:06. Gabe had a car, a really nice car, nicer than Aron had ever seen. Well, maybe it wasn’t that nice, Aron really didn’t know. Aron got in Gabe’s car and they drove to a part of the city Aron had never been to before, barely remembered from its time as a nothingness. It was on the waterfront, a beautiful, high-class burger joint. It had tables out in front, wine, and salads. All these strange things he’d never seen before.
“This is where you get your burgers?” Aron asked.
“It’s one of my favorite places to get food.”
“Okay, I’ll go with you.”
“I’ll pay. I don’t have to worry about money.”
“They sat down at the table closest to the water. They could see the moon, the seven o’clock, April moon hanging low over the water, its crescent shape about to set. There were lights all across it like a dream that was reality. They ordered burgers. Aron tasted the burger and the flavor was excellent, the bun unlike any other it’d had before.
When it looked at Gabe, it felt something. It didn’t know what it was, “Are you a boy or a girl?” Aron finally asked.
“Are you a boy or a girl?” Gabe replied.
“I don’t know.”
“I don’t know, either.”
They sat and it was awkward again, but it seemed less awkward then before. Aron said good bye , went to the homeless shelter and sat awake all night thinking about the whole experience. It had seen the water front before it became a person, but it had missed the lights of the dream. It had seen people with their hands and bodies wrapped together, woven into each other but it did not know why. It didn’t know why it couldn’t sleep, all it could think of was Gabe’s purple head, their mutual awkwardness, and that will to document the quality of every burger joint in the city.
On the day it came to be in the world, it knew it was a person. What am I now? I didn’t know this was out there, what else have I missed? It realized there was color missing. There were things on the wall that were gray, which shouldn’t be gray. So, Aron learned to see Blue. It looked out at the sky and saw blue, not white, and the water was blue. Skirts and jeans were all blue, it was like more lights had been turned on.
Gabe probably would come by again, but for whatever reason, Aron didn’t see them again. It began to wonder how it’d seen Gabe’s purple hair when it could not see blue. Then it understood. It realized it had missed every beautiful piece of the human condition and that it needed to meet so many more people because there was so much more than purple to experience. It could experience sadness, anger, regret, power, wonder, and love. There was more in those people then, the time that he searched the world as a nothingness, more in them because they made the meaning in the world possible.
