She looks tinier than I remember her from just a year ago
do we shrink as we age as babies like weeds grow?
The first FaceTime call in more than a year, to say hello
she’s distracted, showing Buddha to the grandchild
in a movie on her iPad, does Buddha or she know?
Mummy, how are you? are you taking your meds?
Arre Juhi, ab davaiyon sey kaam nahin banega.
Oh Juhi, she says, medicines will not help now.
Distracted, she is pointing at the iPad screen
to show her grandchild what she hasn’t really seen.
Another week, another grandchild, another call
Mummy i love you. I respect and admire you
for what you have endured. I was not strong
Forgive me Juhi, I could not see.
You were very young, Mummy, it had to be…
Two days later, not knowing she was slipping away
flying on the first flight out to send her on her way
halfway exactly on the one hour flight going north
the clouds parted, only at my window, she called
Juhi? O Juhi…her voice was clear and loud.
It was the exact moment that she left her husk behind
She came to say goodbye, and that all would be fine
Mujhe maaf kardo Juhi, softly whispered in my ear
Forgive me Juhi, for what she could not did not dare
say, easing her leaving was the best love I have shared.
My mother’s death was called at the moment I experienced this on the plane 150 miles away in the air. There is great healing in love, Love is the answer.
