Susan
The summer couldn’t be greener. Lustrous canopy of lush green leaves filtered the morning sun to cast such shadows as murals on the tarmac. Crows fluttered, cawing to the picturesque skies. Rumbling of a speeding train echoed from the nearby station.
Little dew drops of mist exuded like beads of diamonds from the dark green benches beside the road. The streets were almost deserted other than a couple of joggers and few rambling retirees. That little town in the suburbs was slowly waking up to a beautiful Sunday in the summer.
Clenching onto the widow bars at a nearby apartment, squinting with his gleaming eyes was Kevin, a 5 year old boy with curly hair and a perfectly round face. He had his bright red Lego truck held passionately with his fist.
Interrupting his muse, Kevin was drawn by the blaring laughs from the driveway of a nearby house. His sight locked upon a middle aged man trying to help his boy ride a bicycle. Kevin giggled at the sight of the little boy falling down in the lawn. He exuberantly watched the boy’s father grabbing him from the lawn and helping him have a second try on the bicycle.
Suddenly as if reminded of something, Kevin glanced at the gray wall of his apartment. His eyes were fixated on a doodle hanging on the wall. There was a little boy holding onto the finger tips of his parents in it. Kevin looked at it pensively.
“Kevin, come over here buddy, finish your milk before its too cold!” — Susan’s words rattled from the kitchen, amid the clanking of china dishes and the noise of dashing water from the sink.
After a moment, Susan hustled down the narrow kitchen door behind Kevin. She was a beautiful young woman in her early thirties. Her wavy hair strands were dancing as she bustled through the narrow passages of that small apartment.
“It’s Sunday, Yaay! Mommy doesn’t have to work. And guess what? Let’s go to the park after breakfast!” — Susan said hugging Kevin from behind.
With a somber look in his eyes, Kevin looked at Susan. “I don’t want to go with Nancy, it’s boring. ” Kevin said despondently, with eyes full of tears.
“Oh, my sweet little prince, of course Momma will be with you. How can I leave my little boy alone at park on a Sunday!” Susan kissed his forehead and hugged him profusely, wiping his tears. “I know how to make my kiddo smile, I know how to do that”. She tickled Kevin and he started chuckling and squiggling. Susan grabbed Kevin and they walked away into their only bedroom. The door of which closed with a creaking voice.
A little more than a couple of years before, their house was not desolated. There was Michael, Kevin’s father in there. When Kevin was a little boy, Michael would take him to the park. And they would play all day long while Susan would chat with her mom’s gang from the neighborhood. Happy days those were. Life became frantic when Michael and Susan decided to separate. Afterwards, it was Susan and Kevin alone in there, giving each other company.
A few minutes later, Susan and Kevin walked out of the bedroom all dressed up in their summer attire. Kevin was wearing a blue flannel and Khakis while Susan was ravishing in her white top, blue jacket and a pencil fit jeans. They walked away locking the flat door and chattering.
Walking into their parking lot, Susan grabbed his toy truck from Kevin and perched it on the rear seat. Leaving Kevin on the rear seat, she kissed his forehead and leaned back on the driver’s seat. Very soon, their old car just sputtered out of the driveway, leaving a trail of thick smoke. Through the windshield, they beheld the picturesque landscapes of the suburbs. The morning sunlight was playing hide and seek through the lush greenery, as they zoomed through the deserted tarmac.
The park was not so crowded for a summer holiday, she noticed. “Here you go buddy, go get your favorite slides and seesaws” Susan muttered as she grabbed Kevin from the rear seat.
Moments later, Kevin was prancing around the park, getting onto anything and everything that came into his sight. It was as if he was touched by a magic wand of happiness and forgot how he missed Michael badly.
“Mom, come help me!” — Kevin yelled from the other end of the park. He was trying strenuously to climb up the steep ladder of the rope course. Susan ran to Kevin and tried helping him make the climb, albeit in vein. Kevin had grown a little too heavy for her to lift up to such heights as a tall ladder.
Susan was taken by surprise when a hooded man strode in from the walking trails and swooped Kevin from behind, unsolicited.
“Hey little buddy, let me give you a little help there” — He said sniffling
“Oh, he’s growing up fast” — Susan replied after a cringe.
“Hey, it’s alright.” He winked at Susan and continued helping Kevin. “Here you go lad” He pushed him up the ladder and Kevin made the steep climb effortlessly.
Both of them watched Kevin hobbling through the rope course passionately.
“I am Jared! Your kid, he’s a sure fighter” — He said wiping off the beads of sweat from his forehead
“I am Susan” — Susan said after thanking him for his help.
“That’s a lovely name! Am so done, you care joining me?” — Jared stiffled and ensconced on to the coziness of a nearby park bench, inviting Susan to join him. Still panting, he gulped a mouthful of his drink. Susan sat down at the other end of the bench watching Kevin attentively.
“Am just visiting my parents’ place in there, couple of blocks around the corner.” Jared broke the short silence pointing his forefinger to the corner of the small park. Stiffling after his strenuous jog, Jared was quite tired and leaned forward supporting his knees.
They spent the next few minutes bantering and watching the children playing around on the rope course, and all that. “You know what, I used to grow up in here, in this little place where everyone knew everyone. My father would take me here every weekend. We used to spend time mostly on the see-saw. I was too light for him, and he would balance me with his bare hands” A gleam of nostalgia flashed through Jared’s eyes as he was looking at the seesaw, laughing softly.
“Ah, you might be having a great time discussing those old stories with your old man now, may be with a beer in your hand” — Susan said winking at Jared.
“ Oh God! I would’ve loved to do that… But he left me, when I was 10.” Jared scoffed and leaned back.
“Oh, so sorry to hear that” — Susan said in a considerate voice.
After a moment of blank, Kevin continued, “It’s alright. It’s not as if it happened yesterday, I’m well past the mourning period; you know.”
“Where’s Kevin’s father? I hope he’s still around” — Jared asked in a quizzical voice.
“That’s another story, better not told. We’re estranged. Its just the both of us now” — Susan said glancing at Kevin.
“That’s unfortunate! You know what, Kevin should have his father around. I know how bad a childhood can be, when the parents aren’t around. He for sure needs his father, Susan” — Jared said whimsically after gulping another mouthful of water from his bottle.
Susan’s reply was mute with a reluctant smile on her face. In the distance outside the park, a silver SUV pulled in to the parking lot and honked, breaking the silence.
Jared acknowledged with a waving hand at the car and muttered to Susan— “I better go now, it’s my lady. She gets a little overwhelming when I make her wait!”
“Needy girls” — Susan said smiling at Jared.
“Anyways, nice meeting you Susan. See you sometime” — Jared laughed and stood up from his seat, waving a bye at Susan
“Nice to meet you too, Jared! Bye for now” — Susan said with a smile on her face and waved him bye. Jared walked away jogging through the walkway in the park.
“Next time we meet again, better Kevin has his father too with him” — Jared looked back at Susan and said in a loud voice. Susan passed a passive smile at Jared and waved him bye again. Kevin was still enjoying the time in the park with other kids.
Later that Sunday, Susan and Kevin visited the mall and the ice-cream parlor and what not. Wherever they went, she could notice how Kevin was missing his father.
How could I never see this in my own son. He for sure is missing Michael very much. – Susan mused while they were driving back home.
Later that evening, Susan was reading his favorite bedtime story to her son. It was well past bed time. Snuggling Kevin, Susan dozed off, for it was a tiring day for both of them. The prevailing silence accentuated the loneliness in that desolated apartment. The beautiful white curtains where billowing in the soothing east wind.
“Ding” — Susan’s cellphone chimed from her bed side and lit up like a midnight sun in the darkness, waking her up.
Wearing her thick black spectacles, Susan unlocked her cellphone and switched on the bedside lamp. It was a text from Michael, her estranged husband. She was stoic, for she wasn’t expecting anything from him, nor she never wanted any conversation with him.
I know I was never a perfect husband, nor a perfect father. I have done things that I regret now. Things that I would’ve reversed if given a chance. I don’t know how to put it in front of you after all those things I’ve done to you. Can we have dinner sometime? At home, your home I mean, with Kevin and me and you. Like we used to do those days. I am missing you guys, badly… Love, Mike
As if not interested, Susan locked her cellphone and put it back on the bed side. Raising her pillow, she leaned back on the coat musing the beautiful days of perennial happiness they used to share. Later, she tried reading something to distract herself from the throbbing memories, but she couldn’t concentrate a bit. It was as if Michael’s face was flashing right in front of her, distracting her from everything else.
Susan took her journal and started scribbling. “Every child deserves to be nurtured by their parents, both of them. Depriving them of a cheerful childhood…” — Flipping pages after pages, she continued scribbling for longer than usual, before closing her journal finally and putting it back in the bedside drawer.
She leaned back on her coat and looked at the innocent face of his sleeping son. She laid there, motionless as if in a trance. After some time, Susan took her cellphone and started fiddling with it. She unlocked her phone and sifted through the long list of Mike’s texts. Her whole life with him flashed like a colorful kaleidoscope in front of her.
Moments of despair, insolent squabbles, painful love making, dreadful mornings; all those rueful shards of life with him faded away as if they never happened, for nothing mattered more than Kevin’s happiness to her at that very moment. She wanted to make him happy, at any cost.
“Yes, lets do that” Susan typed into the tiny keyboard, thoughtfully. She faltered for sometime, before she could finally hit the “Send” button.
With a sigh of relief, Susan locked her cellphone and put it upside down on her bedside. Switching off the bedside lamp, she snuggled happily under the duvet. She had nothing but a pleasant grin on her face while cuddling Kevin’s innocent face, and slowly descending to the depths of a sound sleep. Low rumblings of a passing train echoed from the distance.
“Ding” — In the realm of darkness, her cellphone lit up again with a chime.
~Susan~
