Again
who is he to dictate
that he was my first love
who is he to apprise me
that first love solely betides a single time
the subsequent one deemed second
“You scatterbrained women will never perceive the meaning of love”
he’d declare
for he desired naught of his self-esteem to descend
he desired it to be known that he was the one who ruined my foremost love.
Howbeit, I will fall in love
again
and it shall yet be my first time
I shall be plunged into the deep, harshly
oblivious
and I shall shatter
into a million precious-before splinters
pretending I surmised we’d persist
pretending I held nay experience.
I shall write a glimmer-infused note
I shall deliver it throughout the entire world
up till it reaches you
I shall scream and squeal at our late night heart-to-hearts
and I’d flaunt them to my associates
I shan’t be cautious
I shall bury my own corpse.
go about and elucidate to me my flaws
and that you’d fallen in love an initial time again as well
merely not with me
it does slight to sadden me a single bit
it’s alright
I’d fall in love
for the first time
again,
the second time would arise
the instance I’d have sustained heartbreak one too many times
I shall remain wary
I shan't proclaim the magic words foremost
I’d keep the light on on dark nights
so I shall detect all sudden moves
you shan’t fool me yet again.
but when you do accomplish me,
I’d fall in love
for the second time
and I’d subside carefully
but you’d still pin me to the ground
hard
and I’d yet suppose you to be the one.
venture on and state that second loves don’t last for prolonged periods of time,
they’re a mere distraction
only to be discarded
I’d prove you to be false
and when he forsakes me
it’s alright
I’d fall in love
for the second time
again
the third and last-most love will occur
when I’m left with the remnants of the war
contemplating whether to pick up where I left off
or finally dump the sentiments
befalling shall be close to impossible this time round,
take it as a forewarning
but you’d trudge in
and I’d be mesmerized by nothing in particular
however,
you’d be granting me a basis to believe
again,
thus I wouldn’t repel much.
I’d leave the door open at night
hence you shall voyage in and swallow me alive
but third loves are meant to last
they say
so I’d abide
soon enough,
you would be far too drained
“It’s not you it’s me,”
you’d tell me, I was adventurous
but I was your second love
and second loves aren’t meant to last
it’s alright
I’d fall in love
for the third time
again
and when the third season ceases
I’d be exhausted
and I’d swear to never lock eyes a second time
that is until
I fall in love
for the first time
again.
Existence 2019
