Existential Crisis

Photo by Naomi August on Unsplash

I want more than what I have
I want to leave and move ahead
but everything feels meaningless,
nothing is done so much as it’s said.

The mixture of emotions
that penetrate my mind
drives me to insanity;
leads me to be unkind.

I do not know where I belong,
Forever wandering the road ,map in my head
I had a plan for my future,
But the turn I took is a dead end.

The expectation placed on me
to be a better version than what I am,
Feels like a boulder on my shoulders
making me wish this would just end.

I don’t want to pretend that I am okay,
I am lost, confused and frustrated,
but there is a higher plan to all of this;
Of that I am sure

All I can do right now is be patient.

Shrishti Maharaj 2019