Trimalchio’s Dinner | Eyes of Rome

Trimalchio Orders His Tomb

Satyriconia XXI

Amice carissime, will you make my tomb
As I have ordered it?
So I’ll live long after I’m gone

A statue of me
(carve my dog at my feet)
and flowers garlanded
and jars of perfume

and carve the dates of every fight of Petraites
(not a mere gladiator — a god!)

make it one hundred feet wide across the front
and two hundred ten feet deep

and an orchard set around
every fruit tree, the very best varieties
growing around my ashes
circa cineres meos
let’s throw in a vineyard too

you know, it’s not right
to have a nice house
while you’re still alive
and not think about the home
you’ll have always

Oh, and above it all, add an inscription
Hoc monumentum heredum non sequitur
This monument does not pass to any heirs
in big letters