A Meditation For Watching TV

Like many of you, mindfulness is a really important part of my life. It’s so great to be able to shut our brains off and think about absolutely nothing. However, I’m also a busy, busy millennial lady, and I know the importance of multi-tasking whenever possible. I didn’t see the point in shutting my mind off for meditation AND shutting my mind off to watch 6 hours of TV/day. I’m too busy for that. So I created a meditation we can all practice while also watching television. Please follow along.

Sit in a comfortable position. Make sure your back is supported, because you won’t be moving for the next 5 hours. Pay attention to your surroundings, particularly to what’s happening on the screen in front of you. Breathe in through your nose.

Watch your thoughts as they come in and out, but don’t focus too much on them. Sure, you think this actress is skinny and beautiful, but she doesn’t matter. Let her go- she’s not a real person, and she never will be. You’re never going to look like that. Breathe out through your mouth.

Focus on the noises around you. Are the characters on screen speaking? Is their conversation realistic, or is it a classic example of bad TV writing? At this point in the meditation, you’re probably thinking you could write a better script than the one this show has. But know that you couldn’t. And you never will. Breathe in through your nose.

Let your hands be idle. Don’t also check your Facebook while watching TV like you normally do. This isn’t normal TV-watching. This is meditative TV watching. This is good for you. This is productive. Be present in the moment. Imagine that you’re in the story, and think of how much better it would be to be a student at Riverdale High than to live your own shitty life. Stay present. Focus on the moment. Breathe out through your mouth.

Now begin to let your eyes drift closed. Continue listening to the TV show. Charge your laptop if you need to. Pay attention as your breathe rises and falls. Pay attention as the storyline becomes increasingly implausible. Eat some chips. But concentrate on the crunchiness as you inhale them. When the episode ends, don’t try to control the Netflix queue. Let it move onto the next episode without pushing or pulling. Breathe in through your nose.

Continue this meditation until you’ve finished the entire series. Notice your personal development and growth as you’ve enjoyed this meditation. Repeat this until you’ve run out of Netflix shows. This is where enlightenment comes from. Breathe out through your mouth.