I am not on acid, but maybe
I sit here in my computer chair (weird that we call it a computer chair?), I am perched like a bird sitting on his wooden swing, all while I’m peck away at my computer keys typing words that are coming from my inner monolog that are being transmitted from my brain ….. it’s strange that I feel compelled to share my thoughts with complete strangers but I’m too intrigued to not stop.
Zen, but I eat meat
I get asked often by people that know me closely why I am so zen, and collected during stressful times? is it because I laugh at funerals? I find the lighter side of life, and I try to remember where there is darkness, there is always light. I have had a lot on my mind these days, having a family, managing a startup and also contributing to society. As a human being living in todays fucked up society of degenerates, politicians and ass kissers I often ponder what is real and what is BS or media made. (we will never really know) it’s really a shame we all live on this planet but we cannot be truthful with each other, and what’s even more fucked up is these lies effect loving and innocent peoples lives daily.
Oh hi death
I think deep about death, and what that might feel like, the process of my soul leaving my body (I am not religious)or when that moment will happen. Some might call me crazy, but every now and again I’ll wake up in the middle of the night with my heart pounding only to be reminded that life is short gift and I’ll be gone one day, just like you. I notice these reminders happen mostly when I have been working long, hard hours, and when I get too focused on dumb shit, its like someone yelling at me “Kori, wake the fuck up, none of this shit matters, go live your life and be with your kids”.
Kick rich people in the balls
This is why I don’t understand rich founders, or VCs, it’s almost like they are rubbing it in our faces and don’t respect money. Do you think I work for my fucking health? or because I enjoy answering to some fuckwad I call “Boss”? I work to become rich one day. I am not greedy or evil but I understand money, and how it can change my life and those around me, last time I checked hugs don’t pay the bills. I am sorry but the minute I get any significant amount of money I’am peacing the fuck out with my family, unplugging and moving off the grid to a farming/surfing community to live my life with the ones I love, doing the things that matter to my family. So full disclosure, if you want to acquire my company at any point, I am not a part of the transaction, no, I will not stay for 4 years and no, you will not integrate me into your bureaucratic culture, this is how people get tumors, they do things that they hate for monetary gains and its not healthy.
Life is too short, don’t work your youth all away, go grab what you want now, quit working for Facebook or Google and go build your own company, stop wasting time making someone else rich. Their is no magical book that will tell you how to get rich, it’s called put your head down and hustle, stop wasting time going to dumb fucking meetups, stop wasting your life chatting online about building products.etc and go fucking build something that makes you happy and hopefully a pile of money and then go do whatever you want, you don’t owe anyone an explanation. Every minute your not hustling and trying to better your life, your hammering another nail in your coffin. From what I have witnessed, the days when you will finally be free, you will be medicated and shitting in your diaper.
We are small
In the grand scheme of the universe we are little, our so called big problems (debt, bills, FOMO, homework etc) are so fucking microscopic why do they matter? I often catch myself living life, do you ever? its really neat to catch yourself in the moment, I often become hyper aware once I catch myself and I can’t enjoy it, and instead start to question its perfections and timing. I often get caught laughing at people who get worked up over life, they get too focused on meaningless shit that doesn’t even matter (bosses, promotions, what people think about them…etc), don’t be one of these people, they are missing out on all the worlds beauty.
Its amazing watching my kids grow, they blow my mind everyday. Kids change at such an alarming rate, I ask myself if its ok to blink when I am with them in fear of missing the changes. I know one day they will not want me in their lives at the same level required today, and it breaks my heart knowing this, so I better enjoy it. I guess it’s important to take everything in strides and learn to enjoy my time with my kids, I have a hard time unplugging when I am with my family because I am a CEO of a startup and the product requires much of my attention in order to grow, much like my children do. My kids win hands down, but its frustrating to build a company that could change my families lives, they have a good life already, so its hard for them to understand. I guess its a selfish play on my part, I want money so I can stop working, but the residual effects have long ripples further than our eyes can see.
My life is the chicken and the egg scenario.