11 Simple Ways to Make an Introvert Happy
It’s easier than it may seem!
What doesn’t talk much and socializes with a dog at a party? You’ve guessed it right! An introvert.
So, what are the chances that you have introverts among your friends? The studies estimate somewhere around 50% of the population to be introverts. And yet the world is ruled by our outgoing opposites!
Living in an extroverted world is simply not easy. From early days in school to the modern business world — introverts need to adapt to the fast-paced and loud environment to be able to fit there and be somewhat competitive.
Let’s be honest — life as an introvert isn’t as bad as some may picture it. With the increasing awareness about the social differences between various types of people, extroverts and introverts are learning to coexist in a way that is beneficial for everyone.
Yet, introverts don’t always succeed in communicating their needs clearly (even between themselves), which can complicate things, especially for their friends and loved ones.
Introverts can be somewhat controversial in what they want, so this list is supposed to help those, who care about their fellow introverts, to understand what’s going on in their minds and how they can make them happy.
Give them space
Personal space is THE foundation introvert's happy place. Respecting it is the ground rule of the handbook on how to treat introverts right. It’s in introverts nature to take time to reflect on things and think about them, so pushing them to come out of their shell when they are not ready won’t do any good to your relationship.
Give them your favorite book
The chances that your fellow introvert loves to read are pretty high. Sharing a book that you liked with them is like letting them inside your mind (figuratively speaking), which reflective and observant individuals would appreciate greatly.
Invite them to events, but don’t expect them to come
This might be the hardest thing that I ever had to explain to people — I most likely will not go to your event, but I still want to be invited and feel included.
Inviting an introvert to a social event is not just a polite thing to do even if you know that they will not show up — it is showing that you care about them. And being okay with them not coming — is showing that you accept and appreciate them the way they are.
Don’t call them
Just don’t. Texts were invented for a reason.
Tell them how much they mean to you
Introversion and social anxiety are not the same things, but they often come together. Creating meaningful relationships with others isn’t an easy task, so a gentle reminder of what important role a person plays in your life can go a long way.
Actually, any person would benefit from this little reminder.
Let them speak
And you will be surprised how much they have to say (don’t blame me though if they don’t shut up later). It’s a common myth that introverts don’t like talking — we do! We just don’t like shallow chit-chat, speaking in front of a lot of people, being interrupted, etc.
When introverts find themselves in a comfortable and secure space (probably just hanging out with you one-on-one) where they can easily express their ideas and talk about things they care about, they become fantastic companions. With active listening and encouragement, you can have the most profound and fascinating conversations with them.
Respect their alone time
Alone time is crucial for introverts to process all the information, thoughts and ideas that they come across. Sometime it might take longer, sometimes not. When introverts choose to spend time alone it doesn’t mean that they like you less or don’t want to hang out — it means that they are taking their time to be their best selves the next time that you meet.
Drag them into social interactions from time to time
They will thank you later, even though they might not be happy about it straight away. If I am being honest, we love to be alone together with other people. It can simply mean being in the same room doing different things without interacting — but that would be a very comfortable situation for us and still counts as being social.
Make the first step
If you are an extrovert or a dog reading this — please know that we rely on you! Please use your magnetic personalities to make friends with us instead of waiting for us to make the first step. For an introvert, initiating a conversation with an unknown person is akin to making a phone call. Saving an introvert from doing that will instantly make them like you better.
Don’t try to change them
In fact, don’t try to change anyone — learn to accept them and love them for what they are. Focus on things that you admire about introverts — their ability to listen, deep thoughts, calm and caring personalities, affection for dogs, the talent to disappear from the parties, etc. And love them for it, not despite the things that might or might not occasionally drive you crazy.
Make emotionally-draining plans together and then cancel
Joking! Or am I? It’s a very satisfying feeling when the plans get canceled, especially the ones that you were not raving about :)
Disclaimer: Not all introverts are afraid of phone calls. Not all introverts like reading. Not all introverts loathe social gatherings. Learning about what your introverted friends really like and asking them how you can make them feel secure and happy is a more sure way to show your appreciation and caring.