7 Ways to Deal with Dating App Burnout!

Dr. Paulette Sherman
Live Your Life On Purpose
3 min readJan 21, 2019

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For those of you who’ve tried online dating, you probably know that many frustrating things can occur.

You may message prospects with no response or talk to someone a lot and suddenly they stop writing back.

Sometimes you may feel overwhelmed just trying to message multiple people and recalling who they are.

It can be stressful and time intensive.

Dates may misrepresent themselves or stand you up. But it only takes a few good ones to really make a difference in your love life so don’t give up.

On the bright side, many singles today meet online and go on to have long-term relationships and marriage. It’s important to treat dating like a marathon and to learn tips that will help you go the distance. Here are 7:

1. Treat Initial Messaging like a, ‘To Do Item’:

Writing prospects online can be emotional and stressful. Try to take the emotion out of it. Treat it like a habit that will move you towards your goal.

I recommend to my dating coaching clients that they write short messages to 10 people three times a week in 15-minute stints.

Just like you go to the gym for 40 minutes, you can send love boomerangs out into the virtual universe and see what comes back.

2. Use the Pause Button:

Sometimes we need breaks from an intense stint of dating. Many dating apps like the upcoming Facebook Dating have a Pause Button.

This allows prospective daters to know that you’ll be away for a while and then you can resume messaging and dating when you’re ready.

3. Keep Your Life Balanced:

Remember that dating is just one aspect of your life. You have friends, family, work, hobbies, self-care, travel, fun and more to focus upon.

So when you feel like dating is all that you can think about, look at your schedule and spend some time refueling in one of these other areas as well.

4. Practice Great Regular Self-Care:

When one area of your life is stressful, it’s important to unwind and center yourself. People do this in different ways. You can exercise, spend time in nature, meditate, take baths, have fun with loved ones, laugh or engage in a hobby that you love.

5. Practice Gratitude:

Dating can be ripe with rejection and it’s easy for your world-view to turn sour. A daily practice of writing in your gratitude journal can help you refocus on all the wonderful things in your life that are working. This will elevate your mood and improve your life-satisfaction.

6. Meet People Offline:

If you’re tired of going online you can try other ways to meet dating prospects. Go to singles events, parties, volunteer events, meetups, ask people to fix you up and talk to people while you’re out and about. Be friendly and approachable.

7. Reward Yourself:

It takes a lot of energy to consistently message new prospects when there may be periods of time where you are being ignored, harassed or even ghosted.

You can only do what you can to take action towards your goal. So, reward your efforts (regardless of results) by getting yourself a gift or, treat yourself to a message.

Most of all, don’t give up on finding love. It’ll be worth it.

To learn more about how to use the new upcoming Facebook Dating app, you can read my upcoming new book, Facebook Dating: from 1st Date to Soulmate.’

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Dr. Paulette Sherman
Live Your Life On Purpose

Psychologist, Relationship coach, podcast host of, ‘The Love Psychologist’ and author of ‘‘Dating from the Inside Out.’ www.DrPauletteSherman.com @kpaulet