An Over-Thinker’s Guide to Taking Action
A reflection on making a decision
I am a chronic over-thinker.
Seriously, I throw every thought into a project plan or charter to define the objective, tactics, and outcomes. Every possible scenario needs to be thought through before taking action.
One example is deciding what to wear to work most mornings for work…
Who am I going to see? What are my important meetings? Do I wear the black dress socks with the thick stripes or skinny stripes?
Another example is deciding what to eat…
What did we eat yesterday? Which locations would be busiest and how fast we can get our food? What part of the city will we be going in to? Will there be a sports game on?
Sure, it is good for me to be thoughtful in how I show up and present myself in public spaces. But it is not good to think so hard that it paralysis me in making a decision. A lot of times, it doesn’t even matter what that decision is.
Take the step already!
Taking that first step is the biggest challenge.
The decisions above are very trivial, but indecisiveness shows up in all areas.
My small-task indecisiveness transforms to the large events. It’s magnitude leaves me so self-conscious and doubtful that I’m unable to take action.
Why is that?
For me, I like being comfortable. And if I do step out of that comfort, I’m afraid that my ego and pride will be bruised. I hate that.
So I stay in my turtle shell. Where it’s safe.
You’ve Done This Before!
However, I didn’t get to this point in my life by accident. There were moments in time where I moved, whether by force or by choice.
And those movements were pivotal in shaping where I am and who I am today.
I reflected on past moments where I took action:
- Deciding to be a two-sport collegiate athlete in college, and forego playing the sport I love my senior year of college
- Deciding to stay in college after failing two courses my sophomore year
- Deciding to stay in the Pacific Northwest after college rather than move back home to Southern California
- Being intentional about starting a relationship with my then girlfriend, now wife
- Saying yes to job opportunities that were a stretch in my skill set
In all these decisions, I learned that life will be okay. I learned more about myself and how to trust God with the plans he has for me. I also learned that I don’t have to have it all figured out to take the first step, but the actions I take should align with the person I am striving to be.
Fear has always been there and there was no way of avoiding that. However, it took some courage and community to navigate through it. I am grateful to have had such a strong support group to lean on!
Layout Your Decision Tree!
I thought a lot of these actions through, but there were a few exercises that gave me the confidence to move past the mud of consciousness to make a decision.
- Assess the magnitude of the decision — the greater the decision, the more analysis is needed. My mentor taught me a filter that I use to assess actions where the outcomes hold great weight. (Past experiences, Current circumstances, Scriptures, Prayer, Wise Counsel.)
- Define your goals — The steps I take are going in a certain direction. I need to be clear on my who I am and what I am about so that the actions reflect that.
- Live with no regrets — I want to get out of the state where I set out to do the things that I want to do without any regret of missing out on something or being afraid to move forward.
Grow Through the Pain!
Let’s turn the lens to you for a moment.
How did you get here? What decisions did you take to get your job, or to start working out, make a friend, or find your spouse?
We know we want to grow and move beyond the current position that we are in, whether that is life, career, health or wealth. We are capable of building habits that will build on our skills. And each step we take in those habits contributes to the development of our well-being.
In order to do so, we have to be willing to be comfortable with the discomfort of growth. Ain’t nobody said it would be easy. Being uncomfortable through the growth is one of the reasons why we stop making progress towards the goals we set.
But by pushing through the state of discomfort, we will experience strength, confidence, and perspective.
Growing hurts. And it sucks. But we need to get our mind right with positive talk and will-power to achieve the success we want to gain.
Through it all, it is a learning experience that can shape our next action.
Q&A: Question and Action
If you are having trouble taking action, start by asking these questions to yourself and be sure to share it with at least one other person in your community:
- Why do you want to do it? What is motivating you and what’s the benefit of doing so?
- How does this action align with your goals? Do you have those defined?
- Are you making this a priority? Are you willing to say no to activities that will stall your progress?
- Who will be in your corner supporting you and providing guidance?
- What factors went into the last decision you made? What did you learn from making that decision and how can they be applied to the next decision?
Your answers to take action is often not far from yourself. Look to your biggest decisions of the past to find the blueprint of taking action. Use that experience to shape your next adventure. Be a lifelong learner and constantly find ways to improve your actions.
Then, go do whatever it is you want to do with confidence!
Enjoy the journey!
Ray
