Don’t Be Defeated By Failure
What does failure mean to you?
It is a difficult one to answer and even more so since it is not well accepted by people. I get it, no one likes to fail, but let’s try to be a bit objective. Failure is a result you see after attempting some endeavor, be it physical, mental or both. And after, if you can be honest with yourself, you begin to see where you need to improve. Simple and constructive, right? So where does it go so very wrong?
From my own failures, I think relates to the strong feelings that come afterward
The ones that stick around and hold you in a chaotic and destructive mindset. And how can you not take this failure personally? I mean, it’s showing you exactly where your weaknesses lie and it’s making you aware of the fact that you’re not perfect. If you don’t contain it, it can spread out onto the rest of your life, making it less stable, making Peace seem impossible.
But if you stop the self-pity and accept your failure, you will find yourself being humbled
Failure can be greatly impactful if you choose not to hold a destructive perspective of it. Yes, it is unfortunate, your strong feelings make that quite apparent, but if you are patient enough to improve and learn, you will come back stronger. And your next opportunity will be well faced because you will know what you need to do differently to succeed.
So failure isn’t all bad if you look at it constructively and embrace it for the right reasons
Failure is a part of life and any worthy endeavor you commit yourself to — it exists to help you strengthen your weaknesses. But the key lies in choosing where you invest this energy. You could invest this process in a good and valuable endeavor, or a bad and valueless one — it’s your choice. But I say, invest yourself in the former because life often feels stagnant and unfulfilled in the latter.
Let me leave you here with the words of Theodore Roosevelt:
The credit belongs to those who are actually in the arena, who strive valiantly; who know the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spend themselves in a worthy cause; who at best knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, at worst, if they fail, fail while daring greatly, so that their place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
So just remember,
Use Your Failures Constructively
If everything came easy to you if everything fell onto your lap, how would you know what you’re capable of? How would you know where you need to improve? You will find yourself in many disappointments if you expect everything to be smooth and easy. But if you wish to achieve something for yourself, something impossible, you have to accept failure as much as you would succeed.
Because Life is balance — you can’t have good without bad
A constructive perspective of failure will serve you better. So be patient with your strong feelings, try to be grateful for them because they’re showing you what is meaningful to you. Don’t tie failure to your self-worth, for that is something separate. Failure and success are results, you alone decide whether you’re worthy. Use your failures instead of being defeated by them and you will grow through them all.
“Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat.” ― F. Scott Fitzgerald
Focus Your Energy On A Valuable Endeavor
If you think about it, failure is made up of one or many mistakes, which show you what not to do or say going forward. In a weird way, it helps you improve and be better. But, you have to be careful here because you could invest this improvement process in anything, good or bad. If you wish to maintain a fulfilling life, focus more on the good.
But how do you tell which path is good and which isn’t?
I was stuck on this question for some time until I started to look at the value returned — was it short-term or long-term? Will my efforts satisfy me now alone or will it tomorrow and each day after? This helped me decide where to invest my energy. This is a tough decision to make, but ask yourself, what’s the point of giving in today to the things that will bring you no value tomorrow?
“What is the point of being alive if you don’t at least try to do something remarkable?” — John Green
This Helps You Gain Momentum In A Better Direction
A simple way to better understand this for yourself is to think long-term. Think of yourself years ahead, looking back at the progress you made along the way — what do you want to see? How do you want to feel? I would guess that you want to feel proud for having committed to a better path, for replacing the habits that bring you no long-term value with the ones that actually do, right?
So, use this — let this inspire you to be better today, to be better now
It’s in every thought and every decision you make every day. Understand that there’s going to be failures and successes with anything you do, just be sure that you don’t master the habits that bring no value to your future self — focus on what will make your future self proud. Accept that it won’t make sense at times, but do it anyway. Soon, you will find yourself following a better path and gaining momentum in this direction.
“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” — Lao Tzu
There are many unfortunate things in this life, things that won’t go your way. And you will feel quite strongly about these things because they mean something to you. But, of the things I have learned so far, I know that life always goes on. Failure and success will find their way in and out of your life, and whilst they are significant, you should not rely on them alone to live a good life.
For they are there only to reveal you to yourself
The process of experiencing them is where your appreciation should lie. I know it may sound a little crazy, but this is what life is — to go through all of your experiences, good and bad, and see what it reveals to you about yourself — to learn who you are and who you are not. So, regardless of the result, keep moving forward, keep learning and keep growing. It will all be worth the effort in the end.
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” -Nelson Mandela
Invest In Your Existence, Kind Reader.
