Don’t Be Helplessly Impulsive
Have you ever felt foolish for acting too soon?
Maybe you said something that you shouldn’t have said or done something you shouldn’t have done, but the feelings you felt after told you that you were not right. If you could go back with the knowledge you have now, would you do things differently? Would you have been a little more patient with yourself? Or would you still choose to be impulsive?
If you look at yourself back then in that moment, you would see that you just didn’t know
The situation you faced didn’t reveal enough of itself for you to act better. And no one can blame you for not knowing what you don’t know, but you can be blamed for acting too soon — you can be blamed for not controlling what’s within your control. I agree some situations may need your immediate attention, but you have lived enough of your life to know which situations don’t need you.
Be better by being Patient with your opinion — don’t settle on one too soon
When you feel the strong feelings pulling you down the wrong path, take a moment to consider the many things you don’t know and be humbled by each of them. Let them help you ask the questions you need to ask to dissect the situation to gain a deeper understanding of it. You will notice, as you move towards understanding, the situation will slowly reveal itself to you.
And when you understand the situation better, you act better
The nonsense that once stirred your emotions and led your thoughts down the wrong path, fades away. The gap that once held you back is now filled with understanding, which makes it less likely for you to say or do something regretful. The situation now becomes an opportunity for you to bring great value to it and have a greater impact on everyone who is apart of it.
Let me leave you here with the words of George Washington Carver:
Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the wrong. Sometime in life, you will have been all of these.
Keep these well with you:
Don’t Leave Yourself Helpless To Impulsiveness
Words alone do not save you from this, practice does. In practice, you will find many failures and successes but do well to remember that they both are needed to better this skill. Every situation will seem to need you to act immediately, and some really do, but many don’t. Think about your past experiences that could have been better if you didn’t act so soon.
So save yourself by holding a bit of Doubt with you
Not a lot, but just enough to get you thinking about the things you don’t know in a situation — even if it is only for a few seconds. Instead of responding to Ignorance with Ignorance, take a moment to dissect the situation and fill in the gaps needed to make it a bit more wholesome. It does ask for a great deal of effort, but such efforts save you from succumbing to everything outside your control.
“Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat.” ― Theodore Roosevelt
Be Patient And Strong In Your Patience
To wait is daring, especially when you have not well thought out your actions. This goes against your very instincts, but it wins you a sort of control over yourself. You notice everything seeming a little less rushed and Reason becomes a bit more visible. But most importantly, you find yourself in this learning phase, filling in gaps and building an understanding.
But being Patience isn’t enough, you have to be strong to maintain your Patience
Patience is a series of decisions made in situations prompting you always to act. Choosing it once sets you up for the next, but it does not guarantee it. At some point, you may need to act, yes, but until you find yourself with a better understanding, wait. Ask questions to fill in your gaps. The situation will slowly reveal itself and soon a better opinion will find you — when this happens, act.
“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.” — Aristotle
You Find And Bring Greater Value To Everything
This is a simple practice indeed, and it is the very reason you should adopt it. Being Patient and giving room to Doubt helps you see a situation from many different perspectives — it helps you be less ignorant. Sure, this may seem difficult, but sometimes it is necessary for you to dig deep into the unknown to find the greatest value.
Once you see this value, everything changes
The situation itself becomes an opportunity — an opportunity for you to be greater than the obstacle standing in your way. The words you speak and actions you choose all have purpose. And everyone involved in the situation, if there are any, will benefit too because you repurposed the situation with greater value. This simple practice helps you be a Leader to others and one to yourself too.
“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
This practice is wonderful and quite valuable. But if I can be honest, this may slip your mind at times. Sometimes you can’t help it, a situation may overwhelm you and force you to succumb to it — Life is not easy to predict. This can feel discouraging and disheartening, and you may even consider giving up on these failures. But before you do, consider the words of Marcus Aurelius:
Within ten days you will seem a god to those to whom you are now a beast and an ape, if you will return to your principles and the worship of reason.
It’s okay to fall at times, even the strongest do. If you feel yourself succumbing to an overwhelming situation, don’t leave yourself helpless — stop and return yourself to Reason. You may think your fate is decided, but it isn’t — the moment isn’t over until you decide it is. As long as it lives, you have an opportunity to change it for the better. You get to decide your fate each day with every choice you make.
“It’s time you realized that you have something in you more powerful and miraculous than the things that affect you and make you dance like a puppet.” — Marcus Aurelius
Invest In Your Existence, Kind Reader.
