Lessons Learned as a Two-Term President
Who actually won the popular vote (in her sorority)
If you had told freshman in college Hayley that she would one day be the President of a sorority, she would have laughed in your face.
The leadership aspect didn’t scare me, but a sorority? No way, not for me. I had seen the movies and saw my friends go off to state schools and get sucked into the Greek life trap — I certainly would not.
And then, January came around. I registered for recruitment last minute at the urge of some friends, thinking it wouldn’t hurt to go through it and see what happens.
Well, I fell in love with one place from the very first day, and when I joined Zeta Tau Alpha, I felt like I had a home away from home. Leadership positions were natural for me, so when executive applications came around at the beginning of my freshman year, I applied for a role.
It wasn’t President.
In fact, the rules said that you had to serve on the executive committee before becoming President, so I wasn’t worried — I didn’t stand a chance.
Fast forward a few weeks and I’m in a fraternity basement. I know — I regret that period of my life too. A woman in my chapter, who I love, was quite drunk and approached me to offer her congratulations. I had no idea what she was talking about.
Turns out they had gotten me approved through Zeta nationals to be President, and I was going to be the first sophomore president of Zeta Tau Alpha in years.
In one year, I had gone from never ever joining a sorority to the President of one. And since I had the option to, I didn’t just serve as President for one year — I served two terms (something not all Presidents should do, looking at you in the White House).
In my first two weeks as President, someone from my high school in my grade passed away during fraternity recruitment at another school. He was a tragic victim to hazing, something that has been brought to the forefront of Greek life conversations recently.
His death has caused so much awareness surrounding the subject, but it’s a tragic incident of reactivity and not proactivity. He should be alive today. His passing made me question everything I had come to love about Greek life over the year.
In the impending weeks, an awful sexual assault occurred at a fraternity on our campus, something us sorority Presidents grappled with for the following weeks and months. We’re still dealing with the aftermath. There’s nothing inherently glorious about this position.
And yet, there are a lot of great things about being President. I thought of myself and the women around me as a force to fight these problems, to do the best we could to make this a welcoming and worthwhile community.
Besides the gratification I got from improving my chapter and representing women I adore, I learned countless lessons that I can apply in situations for the rest of my life.
Here are my top 3… I think. There are too many to choose from.
Draw a clear line between you and your role.
Yes, you’re President/Boss/Team Captain/whatever. You’re also yourself. In my case, I was Hayley, your friend, but also Hayley, your President. The women in my chapter needed to know, or rather I needed the women in my chapter to know, when I was talking to them as a friend, and when I was talking to them as President.
You need to do this in the workplace too, especially when you are friends with people outside of the office. Am I coming to you as a coworker right now, or as your friend? Do I have the time or mental capacity for you to come to me as a friend right now, or do I need to focus on my work and being a coworker?
Drawing those lines, setting boundaries and making both of that crystal clear to your “constituents” (gosh, I hate that word) is a key to success. It played a huge part in why I was able to do this for 2 years without ripping my hair out.
Delegate.
Please oh please do it. It’s so easy to get an email that’s probably not meant for you but one of your committee members or coworkers and say to yourself “I’ll just handle this, it’ll only take 5 minutes.” Do you know how quickly 5 minutes add up? Real fast.
Don’t do things that aren’t within your roles and responsibilities. Delegate smartly and carefully. Think about who is best for the task at hand — whose responsibility is it? Send it to that person. You can’t and shouldn’t do it all. You’ll never sleep if you try to. You’re all teammates, so you’re all working towards the same goal. Don’t be afraid to hold them accountable for their part of it and to assign tasks logically and responsibly.
Lean on others.
As a leader, technically the top leader, it’s easy to think of yourself as the lone wolf at the top of the food chain. In some ways, you are. For a year and a half of my term, I was the only person in the chapter who had experienced the Presidential position.
It’s so easy to mentally tell yourself “I’m the only person going through this.” In the beginning, I found it difficult to convey the emotions and experiences I was having to my other friends, within and outside the chapter.
But the thing is, no matter how alone you sometimes feel, you’re not. For me, I found a community in the other sorority Presidents on our campus. We turned to each other during the hard times, for all of the problems that we originally thought were unique to our chapter, but came to realize we all shared.
Everyone can find a community like this. If you’re a boss or CEO, build yourself a community of like-minded bosses and CEOs. You can accomplish a lot more by bouncing ideas and issues off of one another.
Being a President is hard as heck. I found myself mentally, physically and emotionally challenged daily. It took me the whole two years to feel like I had learned these lessons, and I still am mastering each of them. At the end of the day, I’m eternally grateful for this role and the people it brought into my life.
Make it this far? If you did, answer this question in the comments:
Did you join Greek life in college? Why or why not?
