What Are You Worth?
How Self-Worth Affects Your Entire Life
With the world currently in flux during this global pandemic, defining our worth has never been more prevalent. As countries decide who are key workers, what we define as essential and who we deem to be necessary, are decisions that have ignited fundamental global debates. Organizations, companies, governments, friends, and family continuously consider your worth.
However, the only person who can determine your worth is you.
Your perception of your worth fundamentally dictates your life and the choices you make. It’s the difference between taking risks and playing it safe, grasping opportunities, or staying stuck, having minimum standards that you live by, or being respected or disrespected by others. Your self-worth dictates your beliefs feelings and behavior, so it’s vital that you understand your value.
How to build your self-worth
Treat yourself, how you want to be treated by others
If the opinion you have of yourself is terrible, then you can expect a life with low expectations and disappointments. If you don’t see your own worth, then no-one else will. You will attract more and more of the same kind of life and experiences where you always feel unfulfilled.
If you want to be seen as important, you must have a taste of your own medicine. This means taking care of your body, eating properly, getting enough sleep, saying ‘no’ rather than saying ‘yes’ because you are afraid of the reaction. You must ask for help when you need it and put yourself first, not last. Easier said than done, but it’s essential.
Choose your friends wisely
Jim Rohn famously said,
‘We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.’
I’m not sure I entirely agree with the statement, but I understand the premise of the law of averages. Rohn was right. Who we surround ourselves with is vital. If we are surrounded by negative people who complain and never move forward with their own lives, it is likely we will feel their influence.
Spend time with those that lift you up, not drag you down.
Design your environment
How can you expect to have a good sense of self-esteem if where you live is a complete pigsty? We might not live in our dream home, but if you always feel uncomfortable or depressed by your home environment, this has a significant impact on your beliefs.
If you cannot make your bed in the morning and keep your space clean and tidy, how else can you expect to make progress in other areas of your life, if you don’t think that you deserve to live well?
Alter your expectations
We’ve all had those days when you think, “Of course that happened to me, I’ve got bad luck!” You need to change these constant put-downs. Why should it be you that is chosen last or is the person with bad luck? If this is what you always expect, it will always happen.
You need to shift your mindset so that you expect to be offered opportunities, and good things are headed your way. There will always be situations where something negative happens, but if you react to them with an open mind instead of self-pity, your life will begin to change.
Do what you love and have fun
You might not be doing your dream job, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t use your spare time to do the things you love. You need to make time for yourself and use whatever time you do have, to indulge in the things you love. If you don’t do this — what is the point?
When you laugh and enjoy yourself endorphins are released like there’s a party going on. There is also research to suggest that they can actually relieve pain. We need to relax and have fun, it is our brain and body’s way of boosting our immune system — fun is good for your health!
Help others
Something physiological happens we help other people. It activates parts of our brain that are connected to pleasure, social connection and trust, which makes those endorphins start flowing again. Helping someone else with no expectation of reward, creates a fantastic feeling, enabling us to feel better about ourselves.
It could be something as small as listening to a friend going through a hard time, or looking after a family member, sharing your insights through writing or positively influencing or inspiring others. Whatever it is, doing something for someone else, gives us a tremendous sense of pleasure and satisfaction.
It’s down to you
If you think of your worth in terms of financial balance sheets or assets, you are unlikely to ever be happy. Even billionaires who conceivably have everything they could ever want or imagine can feel worthless and unworthy. You cannot determine true worth by the amount of money in your account.
When you decide to value yourself, your entire world will change. People will reflect back on the respect you have for yourself, and you will have opportunities and life experiences that will create indelible memories.
What is your worth?
