When You’re A Victim Of Your Anger

Michael Patanella
Live Your Life On Purpose
4 min readJun 7, 2019

Anger is something that is a normal part of life. We will face it and experience it from time to time through our lives. Anger is an emotion that can be a natural response to situations that we go through. It’s a way that the mind and body tells us that something we’re going through is bad, dangerous, maybe unfair, or several other types of negative scenarios.

Though anger is normal, that doesn’t mean that it can be let loose at full force. Sometimes people needs things like anger management, as uncontrolled anger is something that needs to get back under control.

It can affect us in many negative ways if we aren’t able to live our lives being able to control and manage that anger.

One of the more obvious ways that anger hurts us, is the way that it can affect our health. Most of us probably understand that it can tackle both our physical and mental health.

It’s not a good thing for blood pressure, sleep issues, weight management and it hurts things like the immune system. For myself personally, looking back at my past anger issues, I get the feeling that the body was just not meant to run for long period of times on high levels of anger. We are all going to face anger and stress, but if any of us are facing it for long periods of time, we have to evaluate what is going on.

Often times, it’s as if it’s an exaggerated overreaction, and anger management can pinpoint areas where we should be able to lower the anger. We sometimes allow anger to get the best of us, and we start getting overly angry for even low stress situations and scenarios.

Also let’s not forget mental health. Again, anger is a big part of mental health. And neither numbing it, nor blowing it up is going to save or help anything. It doesn’t just give us aggressive stress. It kills our drive, thought processing, memory, and it just drains our mental strength.

This next one may be overlooked at first, but let’s stop for a second and think about whether or not anger can affect livelihood. I myself used to struggle so much with accepting criticism. Even when it was constructive and correct. I seemed to have a weak grip on my internal anger when I would hear what somebody thinks is wrong about me.

Now let’s face it. In our work life, none of us are going to go 20, 30 years without at least a few of those lovely conferences with our boss. These facts can be that we get on board with learning on how to deal with anger, as well as be able to accept criticism.

Employers may offer anger management with employee wellness plans. But, that’s a maybe. If you need anger management therapy, I recommend seeking it, before career termination.

Since this piece is in place to work as a brief heads up on the negative effects of anger, I could never skip on a piece of the anger puzzle that many of us live our lives for. Our loved ones, and any relationship that is serious and loving. It sounds obvious to say that anger affects families. Many of you could probably make a never-ending list as to how.

Anger is something that we have to learn how to manage in order to have a consistent positive day to day life. We have to control our anger with strangers.

So just imagine what type of bruises and scars can be left on our loved ones, when they are the victim of bloated, senseless anger. I learned the hard way a long time ago that we can apologize all day long. Even forever. But there are times when a verbal apology doesn’t wipe away tears that someone has on the inside because of us.

I suggest anger management for anyone that has anger that is creating wounds on themselves, or others.

Anger can be quite manageable. When we get anger under control, and things improve like relationships, careers, health, and quality of life, you end up giving more of you to the ones special to you.

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Michael Patanella is a Trenton, New Jersey Author, Publisher, Columnist and Recovering Addict, covering topics of mental health, addiction, sobriety, mindfulness, self help, faith, spirituality, Smart Recovery, social advocacy, and many other motivational topics. His articles, memoirs and stories are geared towards being a voice for the voiceless. Helping others out there still struggling.

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Michael Patanella
Live Your Life On Purpose

Author, Publisher, and Editor. I cover mindfulness, mental health, addiction, sobriety, life, and spirituality among other things. MichaelPatanella.medium.com