Can We Truly Compartmentalise Our Emotions?
I can’t.
“Without realizing it, I fought to keep my two worlds separated. Without ever knowing why, I made sure, whenever possible that nothing passed between the compartmentalization I had created between the day child and the night child.”
— Marilyn Van Derbur
I prefer neatness. Although I am not that particular. I can handle a bit of mess. Mess feels like home.
But sometimes I wish we could compartmentalise our emotions. Stack them up and put them in their appropriate drawers. And then, if possible, forget about them until we choose to sort out that mess when we have the time.
But humans are messy. Messy is beautiful. Messy is complicated and messy means overwhelming emotions.
To explain better, let’s take the example of the heart. It cannot control how it feels. It just feels. Sometimes it’s attracted to someone, and you know that that person can never be yours. Yet it feels. It makes you think of random possibilities even though you know it’s pointless.
And then these feelings have a ripple effect. You carry those feelings with you to work and it plays at the back of the head when you’re talking to your friends. In those moments you wish you could compartmentalise these feelings in your closet and get back to it when you have the time.
But Is It That Easy?
With people like me who feel too much, how do we compartmentalise? How do we shut those emotions and convince our heart to feel anything but those mooning feelings?
It’s not only feelings of infatuation that creates a fuzzy feeling throughout the day. A friend that’s going through a tough time, a bad conversation with your dearest family member, the incident that you witnessed while travelling to work, it could be anything that wrecks your stable state of being.
Yes, that’s when we tell ourselves to be mindful of our emotions and focus on the present. But is it truly that easy?
The thing is, for me it’s not. Someone who has been feeling to an extreme since birth, my emotions go along with me wherever I go. But I don’t spill it on to others. I try my best to keep it from exploding as everyone is going through a dam of emotions that is waiting to burst.
You Do You
So, as writers we write our emotions, as painters they paint as people who enjoy a good dose of exercise enjoy a brisk walk or run. We all get through our emotions when we spend time with ourselves and that is the hardest to do as there is no one to distract us from how we feel until we choose to.
Thus, I tell my heart to feel. Feel away I say as being expressive and honest about your emotions is the most beautiful part of being human. Yes, it is not well received by some listeners but again they wouldn’t know the courage it takes to be the vulnerably beautiful you despite the punches of reality.
We can choose to compartmentalise. Some emotional drawers may not shut, and some might overflow. Some may go empty as there won’t be anything left to feel about that emotion and that’s okay too.
What’s important is knowing and acknowledging how you feel. Because that’s when you know you are confident. When you know yourself more than anyone else, you dictate decisions from a sorted mindset rather than a confused one. And to be a sorted and well informed emotional being you must go through the turmoil of emotions first. Even if that means figuring out which compartment each emotion will fit in.
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