Dear Diary, Man Is a Social Animal — Yeah, Right
The rantings of a frustrated mind when confined over a weekend lockdown.
Dear diary,
Last weekend, I didn’t feel like doing anything. Yes, regular eating, sleeping, showering and other daily habits are well required. But then there are times when you feel like doing nothing. Nothing means absolutely nothing. For me, it was just lying in bed and staring at the ceiling while the fan made its regular rotations. After that activity, which almost lasted for thirty minutes, I randomly started staring at the wall, noticing the bleeding lines and the colour of the paint.
You see, it was a quiet weekend in Mumbai. The peace outside somehow got through to me, and laziness started creeping in. Until it made me realise why the famous saying ‘man is a social animal’ exists.
The Moments of Silence
Like everything, too much of anything is wrong. For humans, too much of staying in is worse. The silence of no one around, the silence of a busy street, the silence that forces you to pay attention to the wind’s sound in a 24/7 noisy city like Mumbai is not suitable for the mind and body.
But as I observed my inner thoughts and feelings, I realised that over time we adapt. Like wearing a mask, sanitisers at every shop and realising the pain of not being permitted to hug people when you meet them for long. Similarly, the scary bit is that when you are forced to be still, you adapt to that too.
The next thing you know, you start talking to yourself. The thoughts don’t stop. You may try, but some memory comes to shake you. A memory that was filled once with happiness makes you miss moments, and that’s when the self-talk begins. The social aspect of being human doesn’t end even though you’re talking to yourself.
The Human Touch
So, what else can one do to keep sane? Journal? Binge-watch a show, or maybe pick up the phone and talk to someone? That gives a moment’s relief, and then ultimately, you’re back with yourself.
Rising COVID-19 cases have also raised frustration levels. With wrecked livelihoods, relationships are facing testing times. And with it, the once upon a time activity of social interaction is also seeing its lowest point in history.
There is a limitation to how much one can talk over a screen. The essence of physical proximity helps understand emotions and feelings better, which cannot be experienced over a screen with bright light.
Hugs and stimulating conversations where facial expressions replace words and moments of silence over talks that give us all the answers we need are not possible over a work meeting online.
This too Shall Pass
Man is a social animal. But the term social has changed its definition since March 2020. Over the past year, the fact that we cannot do away with phones and laptop screens has now helped us realise that when we are in person with the people we love, we wouldn’t for one second want to stare at our smartphones.
It gets to you. The confinement, the news and the posts of our friends testing positive. In a country where festivals are an essential aspect of people’s lives, families are now celebrating over online meetings is disappointing.
Like everything else, we need to have faith and hang in there. We need to continue living in the present while believing that with time the frustrations we face today won’t even matter in a few years from now. That when things do get better, if nothing else, we learnt to be patient. We realised the value of relationships and spending quality time with people without giving a second of our time to our phones.
For now, we use this time to introspect our strengths and weaknesses. We understand how calm we can be and how to productively face what we feel and not run away from it. How we need to accept what we think and write about it.
As every phase is a lesson, this lesson will help us emerge stronger. But only if we do the work, if only we hang in there and tell ourselves that no matter how tough life gets — if we have survived this far, we will survive the days ahead.
