The Rejections That Don’t Kill You, Make You Stronger
Every ‘No’ is leading you towards your much-deserved ‘Yes’.
If you were born and brought up in Mumbai, India, or have been living in the city for some time, rejection is something a Mumbaikar probably faces every day.
Thanks to the ‘rikshawalas’ (normally a very convenient three-wheeler transport to get you anywhere (see picture)). Before one rikshawala says ‘yes’ to your destination, you may face the rejection of not less than ten or maybe twenty rickshaws. So, getting rejected somewhat becomes a habit.
Rejection hurts, and it comes in various shapes and sizes. Here are a few of the most painful forms:
It’s Over
‘It’s me, not you’, ‘I don’t think it’s working out anymore’, ‘I am sorry, but my family won’t agree to us’ (probably the most illogical reason but in India it’s expected). Regardless of the message, the gut-wrenching pain for any of them is the same.
We Regret To Inform You
Whether it’s that 50th job application that gets rejected or a rejected college application, it makes you feel worthless. The constant thought that there is no place for you in the living world takes a toll on your physical and mental well-being.
We Are Sold Out
You’re almost done checking out, and the moment you hit ‘buy now’, the screen goes bonkers, and you see the words, ‘sorry, we are sold out’. That dress you had your heart set on is the last piece available and to your dismay, not available in your size.
You leave early from work, travel miles to get to your favourite eatery, but Mumbai traffic always wins and by the time you reach your destination, the attendant smiles and says, ‘Ma’am, we’re full’.
Such rejections may seem small, but if you’ve been through it, you know exactly how miserable it feels. And no matter how you receive it, the word hits you hard. For some, the pain gets worse and giving up seems like the only option.
Nothing is easy. Everything comes with a price tag and unfortunately, if there isn’t one, we don’t see its value.
Take a moment and think about everything that you’ve achieved so far. You must have put in blood, sweat and tears — maybe even heard negative comments that motivated you further. What worked for you then was the very fact that you ignored the ‘No’ and kept working on getting that ‘Yes’.
However, if you look back, you’ll realise that all the rejections were worth it. And when you achieved what you wanted, it was more than anything you could’ve imagined.
Don’t Give Up, Because That ‘Yes’ May Be Next
About twelve different publishers rejected J.K. Rowling. Would ‘Harry Potter’ exist if she had given up? (Thank god she didn’t, or my childhood would have been challenging.)
Steve Jobs was fired by the company he created. Probably one of the best things that must’ve happened to him.
Steven Spielberg was rejected by the University of Southern California School of Theater, Film and Television. Three times. If he gave up, would we have ever witnessed his legendary movies?
What each one of them had in common was that hunger to fulfil what they truly believed in. And despite the rejection, they got back up the next morning and knocked on another door.
We often fail to see that some rejections are just out of our control. It could be people, situations or outcomes. In such moments, no matter what you could have done, it wouldn’t have been enough. It’s in these moments that you must look on the brighter side, no matter how devastating the current moment seems. Don’t be too harsh on yourself. Give ‘time’ the time it deserves, and you’ll emerge stronger.
As in the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, the ‘Phoenix’ rises from the ashes and you, too, will wither away, heal and take flight towards destinations never explored by humankind. As the wise German philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche, once said, “what does not kill me makes me stronger.”
You, too, must believe that the rejection which didn’t kill you, just made you a hell of a lot stronger.
