Observation #5 The devil made me do it.

I am sitting on a balcony overlooking the Caribbean. It’s January 2022 and a pandemic is still raging throughout the US, both here and in Pittsburgh. And yet, I lingered in two airports, went on two flights to get here, hoping that my vaccinations and boosters will protect me from whatever physical misery I am courting.

Sensible people in my life just shake their heads at me. WHY? I wonder that myself. But as I was driving to the airport, the anxiety I was feeling matched the anxiety I felt recently waiting on line to ride the Thunderhead Coaster at Dollywood in late November.

And what was the connection? David. He was the instigator. He’s ALWAYS the instigator. All of a sudden a pattern fell into place.

Let me tell you something about David. He is a Gemini. Maybe that’s all you need to know. To the world, as far as I can see, he presents as a quiet introvert, sensible and measured. He’s a true WASP, also. When I am feeling aggravated with him, I will point out that Hitler would have loved him- lanky, blond, blue eyed and just tall enough. It isn’t fair, I know…but he can lean into it as well when it suits him. When he gave his first speech as Dean of Education at Penn State to the Board of Trustees, I was approached by one of the Board members, an older gentleman of Central PA. “Liked your husband’s talk,” he said to me, “reminded me of Jimmy Stewart.”

So the world isn’t to be blamed when it looks at us and declares ME to be the fanciful one, who needs the steady hand, who provides the lighted hearted yin to his sober yang. Well, appearances, as it is said, can be deceiving. At our family dinners back in the day, our children would look to me for reality checks, not him. They knew.

In texting back and forth to my sister about this trip the connection became clearer. ‘of all the damn fool things David and I have done over the years, this doesn’t even make the top ten.”

I’m not complaining. I’m merely marveling.

This, a birthday card that my sister sent David more years ago than I can remember, sums it up. ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

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“The greatest thing in the world is to know how to belong to oneself.” Michel De Montaigne. And that’s what this space is for: Reflection, observation, commentary, questions as we figure out our particular place in this particular world.

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Pamelapolis

Dealing with reality on an as needed basis. Celebrating serendipity and seeking equilibrium. On a treasure hunt.