Struggles in a Long-Distance Relationship

Couples Coaching Online
Long-Distance Relationship
6 min readMay 20, 2021
Struggles in a Long-Distance Relationship

You may find yourself struggling in a long-distance relationship. While it can be hard to be away from your partner for a long time, it doesn’t have to be a struggle.

Many couples experience struggles in a long-distance relationship. These struggles give the impression that long-distance relationships are hard. It can be hard to stay away from your romantic partner for an extended period. But your long-distance relationship doesn’t have to be a struggle when you know how to handle it the right way.

There are several reasons why couples struggle in a long-distance relationship. In this article, we’ll talk about the struggles that couples face while apart and the ways you can deal with the struggles.

Are Long-Distance Relationships Possible Without a Struggle?

The reason couples struggle in a long-distance relationship is that they see it as a burden. If you focus on how inconvenient this relationship is and how many things you cannot do while long-distance, you will see your situation as a struggle.

It’s possible to enjoy your long-distance relationship. The way to do it, it’s by changing your mindset. If you stop focusing on the negative, you won’t be able to see the benefits of being in a long-distance relationship.

However, to avoid struggling through a long-distance relationship, you have to understand what it is and what it involves.

Long-distance relationships are romantic relationships where a couple is separated by geographical distance. Since it is a romantic type of relationship, you expect to have physical intimacy in your life with your partner.

In a long-distance relationship, physical intimacy is only possible when you visit each other. If you have the means and the time to visit each other as often as you’d like, you can make your long-distance relationship last for a little longer.

Many couples don’t have the luxury of visiting each other regularly. After some time, this lack of physical intimacy can manifest as sexual frustration.

Sexual frustration overspills in other aspects of your life, leaving you frustrated about many things most of the time.

For these reasons, long-distance relationships can work very well, but only for a short period.

Why Couples Struggle to Maintain a Long-Distance Relationship?

There are many reasons why couples struggle to maintain a long-distance relationship. The two main reasons are communication and physical intimacy.

The way you communicate with your long-distance partner is different from how you communicate when you’re living together. In a long-distance relationship, your primary forms of communication are through text messaging, phone calls, and video calls.

When you’re away from your romantic partner, you have a lot of doubts, uncertainties, and frustrations. These are things that ideally you’d be able to discuss with your partner.

Talking about your feelings and expressing yourself clearly isn’t as easy when the person you love is away.

Another reason for people to struggle in a long-distance relationship is the lack of physical intimacy. If your long-distance relationship lasts for a few months, and you can see each other at least every other week, you can maintain physical closeness.

But, if you don’t have the means to visit each other regularly, and you don’t have a plan for how you can make a long-distance relationship work, it will quickly become a struggle.

Common Struggles of a Long-Distance Relationship

Here is the list of everyday struggles that couples go through while in a long-distance relationship:

  • Excessive communication or a lack of communication.
  • Confusion and misunderstanding when trying to express yourself through text messages, phone calls, and video calls.
  • The insecurity of how your long-distance relationship will work out.
  • Growing mistrust of your partner, because of your insecurities, or their behaviour.
  • Sexual frustration due to the lack of physical intimacy.

How Do You Fix a Struggling Long-Distance Relationship?

If you are struggling in a long-distance relationship, you have to understand what is causing your struggles. You can use the list above to give you an idea of the kind of struggles couples face in a long-distance relationship.

Once you understand what exactly you’re struggling with, you can express it to your long-distance partner. If you need help expressing your thoughts, feelings, and doubts your partner, check out the article on how to communicate effectively in a long-distance relationship.

Once you can express your feelings to your long-distance partner openly and clearly, you need to make sure that they understood your point of view. For this, they have to be willing to see things from your perspective.

When a couple struggles in a long-distance relationship, it can be hard for partners to hear each other.

When things go wrong, both people tend to suffer, and each person wants to be heard and understood. If this happens, to save your relationship, you may need help from a relationship coach who can listen to both sides and find a way to bring the two of you together.

Here’s are general tips and advice for couples who struggle in a long-distance relationship:

  • Agree with your partner on how long the distance in your relationship will last.
  • Have a specific end date for you to move in together.
  • Make a plan and a timeline to maintain your long-distance relationship for as long as it lasts.
  • Discuss when and how is the best way for you to communicate.
  • Avoid excessive communication, which can lead to a waste of time and a boring relationship.
  • Agree on how often you will visit each other while in a long-distance relationship.
  • Spice up your long-distance relationship with gifts, romantic surprises, and spontaneous trips together.

Conclusion

Many couples believe that being in a long-distance relationship has to be a struggle. They expect to suffer, so that’s what they get.

It is undeniably hard to be away from your romantic partner for an extended period. But long-distance relationships aren’t meant to last a long time. So, if you are in a long-distance relationship that lasts for longer than a few months, you have to expect problems and suffering.

You might be in a long-distance relationship with someone you love but struggling to find a practical way of being together; this is a tough place to be.

Sometimes it helps to create a space to reassess your long-distance relationship. Take a step back from all the struggle and look at your relationship for what it is, rather than what you would like it to be.

To help you, make a list of feelings, thoughts, doubts, and ideas you have regarding your long-distance relationship. Then, share what you’ve discovered with your long-distance partner. Try to hear them out and understand their point of view on your relationship.

See what your partner has to say and do your best to understand them. Once you have an understanding with your long-distance partner, you can take a trip together and talk it out.

A lot of struggle in a long-distance relationship comes from partners not being able to express with each other; this can leave you feeling alone and confused. If you feel this way, you either find a way to talk about your relationship with your partner or let it go.

Need an LDR Coach?

  1. Send me a message and describe your situation
  2. I’ll get back to you with some thoughts & ideas
  3. We’ll arrange a video call to discuss your relationship in more detail

Frequently Asked Questions

What are everyday struggles in a long-distance relationship?

Most common struggles in a long-distance relationship are miscommunication and lack of physical intimacy. It’s hard to make your long-distance relationship work if you cannot express your thoughts, feelings and hear each other out. To deal with the lack of physical intimacy, you could schedule regular visits and romantic trips together.

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