Fated to Cross Paths
was it also fate that it wasn’t to last?
What do we give?
Who do we forsake?
It’s impossible to see
the path we have to take.
You left too soon
and I wondered too late
the ever-elusive reason
for your sudden exit.
To be fair, I barely noticed at first,
as you waned
from my life and
from my mind.
I sailed on in my ship, oblivious.
The currents of life ever-flowing,
taking me to new lands, new seas,
softer sands and fresher breeze.
My eyes fixed on the horizon
ecstatic about what lay ahead
unprepared, sea-blown,
ignorant and terribly alone.
When I finally came to
I looked around frantically
speechless and confused;
the horizon darkened.
When did I get so far
from the path, astray?
A sailor lost at sea,
a captain without a mate.
I searched fruitlessly
for some explanation
with clouded sight,
as to why you left,
like a thief at night,
wordless and deft.
I emerged empty-handed of course,
because sight clouded is ofttimes
worse than benign blindness:
construing details from hazy shapes,
convictions from evidence lacking,
and seeing what isn’t really there.
I drew thus my own denouement
of what had transpired
and distanced lurking thoughts,
convinced it was all for the best,
with no fault of mine
why and when you left.
Its been a while now,
for it to settle and subside.
You are an unreal memory
from a surreal time.
The stolen hours we spent
talking and fraternizing,
just to realise more of ourselves
in the other.
It felt like we were
fated to cross paths
was it also fate that
it wasn’t to last?
I can hardly remember anymore.
Your trail is already fading,
footsteps just a smidgen,
a freckle in the dirt.
But now with clearest sight,
that of unfailing hindsight,
I’m starting to see —
it dawns on me
that you didn’t really go.
I made you leave.
You even asked to stay,
and me, with no real intent,
stoically and passively,
pushed you away.
I grasp at straws
trying to catch a glimpse
at what could’ve been,
and if it should’ve been.
And I’m left wondering if
it really was all just me.
Now I’m writing a story,
the story that couldn’t be.
What do we give?
whom do we take
along to see
the world we’re going to make?
