An Interview With a Man Named Ruth

I first met Ruth Watson at a software convention in San Francisco back in the spring of 2015. Ruth is a tall man, about 6’4″ with curly auburn locks and a pencil-thin mustache. Ruth was at the convention promoting a new app that he had developed. I’m not completely sure what the app does, but I think it has something to do with finding places up and down the coast that rent out motorcycles with those side-car things on them.

During one of the lunch breaks, I took the opportunity to speak with Ruth. Here is that interview in its entirety.

Don: Hello, Ruth. Thank you for taking the time to do this.

Ruth: My pleasure. It’s just a joy and an honor to be here at this convention. Did you see the drone booth? They deliver tacos now. Amazing.

Don: No, I have not seen that, Ruth.

Ruth: Not to be rude, but I actually prefer “Mr. Watson.”

Don: Miss Jackson if you’re nasty.

Ruth: What?

Don: I’ve never met a man named Ruth before. Tell me, did you get teased as a child?

Ruth: What the fuck do you think?

Don: Fair enough. Is it a family name? Or was your mother maybe having a postpartum stroke when she named you?

Ruth: I’m sorry, can we talk about my app? I thought the purpose of this interview was to talk about my app.

Don: Oh, yes. Of course. But first, Ruth, when you see a sign for Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse do you silently bubble up with anger and think “Why couldn’t they have named me Chris?”

Ruth: Well, no I don’t think about that. Anyhow, this app that I have developed–

Don: Sorry to interrupt, but I know a lot of people, both men and women, who go by their middle name. Have you considered that? I mean what’s yours?

Ruth: Margaret.

Don: Thanks, that’s all the time we have. Pleasure meeting you and best of luck with The Ruth Margaret Watson Motorcycle Side-Car app.

(For more Don Theo silliness, come hang out with me at https://lopsidedsky.wordpress.com/)