Don’t I Get a Say in Whether My Son Has a Vasectomy?
His decision ruins my chance to have grandchildren. Rude!
William, my 23-year-old son, has decided to have a vasectomy. He’s laid out sound arguments that include the fact that his long-term girlfriend has no interest in becoming a mom. He’s very clear: he does not want to be a dad. Ever, he says.
Before I could gather my thoughts to say anything, he complained that the small handful of people he’s told, people my age, have challenged his decision with questions like,
“How can you be sure you’ll never want kids? You’re still so young.”
Damn! Now I couldn’t ask the obvious since then he’d put me in the “Annoying Old Person” box.
But I am concerned that he’s not really sure because at this stage of his life—working for minimum wage, paying 50% of his take-home on rent, and eating KD like a Kraft shareholder—he’s making the big V decision based on fear.
He promised me grandchildren
When William was little he spoke about having a huge family, lots of kids. He hated being an only child and once step-brothers were a possibility (after his dad and I split) he sat on the edge of my bath one night and said with so much longing,
