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What Stoic Philosophy Says About Love
How do the stoics approach the issue of love?
As part of a series called “The Philosophy of Love,” I’m exploring how different life philosophies approach love. We’ll explore some of the philosophers’ viewpoints on love, relationships, and romance, and share some quotes from their writings.
Stoic philosophy has become somewhat synonymous with a passionless, emotionless life. When we say someone is “stoic”, we are observing how that person doesn’t show much of an emotional reaction to a situation.
Considering this stereotype, it would be interesting to further explore how stoic philosophers approached the idea of love, using excerpts from their writings to understand more how relationships and feelings shaped their lives.
First, let’s start with one of the most famous stoic philosophers, Marcus Aurelius:
“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive — to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”
Marcus Aurelius — Meditations
For stoic’s, life was all about appreciating what you had in the moment. To love what you had around was the important thing. Unrequited love, on the other hand, would be frowned on. Life was wasted if you made yourself miserable wanting something you couldn’t have:
“We live only now. Everything else is either passed or is unknown.”
Marcus Aurelius
For some, this might make stoics an anti-romantic lot, opposed to being stirred by tender feelings of compassion and love for someone else. This isn’t quite true, though, as Aurelius was quite taken by the beauty of life, and believed that we should love what is around us with all our power:
“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.”
Marcus Aurelius
