DEAR MEN
Why You Keep Getting Friendzoned and How to Fix It
Sometimes it’s them, but mostly it’s probably you.
As I was re-reading the sub-heading of this title, it immediately hit me that it felt judgmental. I could hear the voice of my friend, Ian (who has been friend-zoned his entire life) say, “Maybe I’m just really ugly and nobody wants to date me.”
So, I thought about it. Was he right? Was it something he was doing (and therefore a completely avoidable situation?) or was it simply that he was unattractive (and there was nothing he could change about it)?
Ian’s close relationships consist of a lot of women who love him — just “not that way.” I know, because I am one of those women. I was attracted to Ian on sight. He’s handsome, athletic, and had a great smile. It wasn’t just my opinion. People would frequently stop us in the street to tell us what a cute couple we made. On our first date, he made me laugh and was very sweet. He was very easy to be around.
But there’s a reason we’re not dating and it’s not because he is unattractive. Over our years of friendship, I’ve met the other women in his life who have friend-zoned him as well and we all share the same perspectives about him.
