As long as I can remember I’ve always had a passion for video. I still remember as a seven year old kid, watching a dubbed VHS version of Return Of The Jedi everyday during the summer of 1987. I suppose after watching it so many times, even if it was only in my subconscious I began to see the pieces that put the film together. The iconic musical cues, camera angles, visual FX and such sparked my imagination. I wanted to know how it was all done and more importantly how to put it all together!
Fast-forward to today and video is now a part of my daily life. Working as an assistant editor day-by-day and producing my own stuff via freelance when time allows for it has truly been a blessing. While it is truly rewarding to work within this industry there is one troubling thing that I can never seem to shake entirely when working on some projects. One thing that always seems to leave me a bit uneasy, unsure of myself. In some cases it even freezes me in fear and doubt momentarily.
The empty timeline or the “blank canvas” is often a frightening prospect for me. Even with all the tools and plans ready to go, it’s sometimes getting started that can be the hardest thing. At one point I thought it was just plain procrastination which in some cases has played a role but is hardly the root cause. The only true cause I can come up with is the fear of getting stuck in the edit to the point where I’m not sure how to continue. It can be that the edits are not going together the way I intended, a technical issue or simply having an idea and not being sure how to do it. It’s sort of like writer’s block. It is that process of trial and error to claw my way back to having faith in a project that I dread. It’s that point where you thought knew what you were doing begins to slip away to the point where you feel like you’re floating in the nothingness of space. Not being quite sure where exactly you are, where you’re headed and powerless to control your destination.
I suppose that could be said about life in general. No one likes to lose control…..especially when decisions need to be made. I recently had the task of writing a script for a short promo at my church. Since I do not consider myself a script writer, “Writer’s block” came upon me immediately. It also did not help that I wasn’t given much time to work on the project and had several other projects already on the go. At one point even if it was a only a for a few moments, I considered just shutting down completely, and taking some time off as I simply could not see past the task ahead of me.
What helped me get back on track was a scripture from 1 Peter 1:7 that reminded me of the path a person’s faith must go through to be validated. Peter spoke of at a time when Christians were being persecuted for their beliefs. He reminded them that the trial of persecution was meant to test and strengthen their faith and that test was more precious than gold. It is very much the same when being involved in creative projects. Your faith in a project must be shaken in order to prove the strength of your commitment to it. After all, why be involved in a project at all if you aren’t committed?
To worry about what might happen if you get stuck, confused or doubtful is simply a waste of your imagination.
At the end the day after much prayer I did the same thing I always have done with the blank canvas. I simply ignored my fear and doubt and just went ahead and started working. That uneasy feeling you get when that sense of things being in your control starts to fade away can actually be the best thing to happen. It forces you to break new ground and stretch yourself. To worry about what might happen if you get stuck, confused or doubtful is simply a waste of your imagination. Instead, put that energy into generating ideas or simple trial and error. Yes it may be dreadful, may take some serious time to go through and you may make a ton of mistakes along the way but at the end of it all, you may come up with much more than you intended. The least thing you will get is more experience and sharpen your skills at your craft and quite possibly dig up some “gold” in the process.
Despite what technology offers, nothing will ever replace the reward that comes with perseverance and hard work.
Even if this latest project is nowhere near my best work (and has some glaring mistakes in my estimation) I did learn some valuable lessons going forward. I broke through the mental block I had concerning script writing. I got to work with some great pastors and had to do my best to work within the fact that they aren’t used to having a camera in their faces in this manner. Those lessons and others I learned are worth the frustration it took to get the project done.
I’ve been wanting to get back to blogging for years but kept putting it off fearing I did not have much to share, so in a sense the very example of me starting to write again is another example of overcoming the “block” that we all face at some point. I can most definitely say that even in writing this I’ve learned some things about myself so once again the risk of not being able to complete the task of writing was worth it.
We often rob ourselves of experiencing the precious “gold” of experience through trial and error and instead look for the “microwave” solutions the 21st century offers when problems arise. I, for one believe, despite what technology offers, nothing will ever replace the reward that comes with perseverance and hard work.
So when fear, doubt and procrastination arise during a creative pursuit or even if it is just a major decision you are facing, convert those thoughts into energy towards moving forward and let the pieces fall as they may. I promise no matter the outcome it will be worth it. In fact, I would go as far to say that if you aspire to improve yourself in any pursuit at some point you will have to experience the blackness of space where things are out of your control. Only then will you be truly forced to push yourself to the point where you regain control and are stronger, wiser and better off than you were before.
“Worry is a misuse of imagination”
If you’ve ever felt this fear of the blank canvas or writers block? Regardless of whether you’re a editor, writing, painter, graphic designer or work in some kind of creative discpline I’d love to hear how you overcome these issues so feel free to share your experiences by either leaving a comment here on Medium or on any of my social networks below:
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Also check you my friend Monique’s enjoyable and insightful blog posts whenever you have a chance. She’s an old fashioned girl who writes from the heart. I’m sure you’ll find her posts to be a breath of fresh air as much as I have.
See her blog here
