Finally, Herds Of Armageddon
“It’s funny, but, have you ever noticed how all the best apocalypse movies start with really strange animal behavior?”
Agent 19 didn’t respond, he had the headphones on again and was rocking his head back and forth. It was Nigerian soul, I could tell.
I moved my head around the monitor and looked at him.
He accidentally didn’t notice me by moving his head slightly to the side and continuing with the head held there as he listened intently to the music.
So I schooched the high quality office chair out further into the pathway that led down along the rows of tables so I was blocking passage for anyone walking.
He closed his eyes and swiveled his chair around towards the windows, humming along to the music — it was Nneka
I was right again. It’s Good to be King.
He leaned back in the chair and then I could tell he had opened his eyes because he yelled out quite loudly “What the Fuck!?!” Then he fell off the chair, pushing it rolling back towards the wall, I stopped it rolling with my foot and pushed it back towards him.
The leather covered edge of the seat bounced off the back his head “Ow” he said, then stood up, still looking at the window and then he looked at me “What the fuck?” he asked, I figured this was about hitting him in the back of the head with the chair and not the long lines of pigeons perched on the edge of the building, stacked several birds deep and staring deeply into the office. I decided to act as if it was about the birds though.
“It’s funny, but, have you ever noticed how all the best apocalypse movies start with really strange animal behavior?”
“Oh yeah? Name one!”
“The Birds”
He didn’t look too happy with that answer because of the flipping me off.
“Ok well that doesn’t matter anyway, it’s just one isolated incident.” Agent 19 set back at his desk and went on with his listening to deep grooves and acting like he was actually working.
I however had my suspicions
That This
is not
An isolated incident.
— Agent 77
FINALLY
Finally it has happened to me right in front of my face
And I just cannot hide it!
Finally it’s been found, the one word that can be used during sex and every other human interaction —
Other than Ugh, which Merriam-Webster tells us is
used to express disgust or horror
So like not only can you say “finally!” when you orgasm, but also when the person you hate most in the world is dead! But ALSO
When they rise from the dead because it is a zombie uprising. Disgust and Horror, finally a word that ties it all together!
Finally it has happened to me that I have superpowers or I blow my load!
Both equally cool things to compare and try to find a word that fits in both occasions!
What word can you say at a friend’s wedding, and while banging their spouse a week before the engagement was announced?
FINALLY
Finally you’ve come along
The way I feel about you, it just can’t be wrong
If you only knew the way I feel about you
I just can’t describe it, oh no no
— Agent 19
This article tracks recent developments on the Illuminati Ganga Twitter account, with extra exposition by Illuminati Ganga Agents 77 and 19.
Curation and Editorial work was done by IG Agent 86.
The Playlist for this article is
OTHER RESOURCES
As you will no doubt have noticed we reference tweets from the following people who are not members of Illuminati Ganga — check them out
Woman Of Wonder — @WonderW97800751
A little bit of this and a little bit of that. Content not her own unless stated otherwise. Parental guidance is suggested.
Ross McCulloch — @Rossmac212
The funniest vines, gifs and comedy. Massive boxing and football fan, support Glasgow Rangers and Swansea City.
Deb 🌻 🟧 @DontCallMeDebby
Vote Blue! 💙 Lover of Nature, Twizzlers, hockey, art & theater
Out of Context Human Race @NoContextHumans
The ORIGINAL Out of Context Human Race page! Subscribe to us for $1!↗️ DMs Open. Sub to our YT below👇
— huh, we oughta have people subscribe to us for 1 dollar too, no price is too small to pay for access to the top secret secret organization running the world, Illuminati Ganga, and currently they’re paying no price!
Other Articles of Interest in relation to the Agents involved in this article
Agent 77 cleans up dead skinheads and perverts from a party
Agent 19 admits his love for Rod Stewart
