Stan Is Law
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IG Agent 6 — OK, first off I have to say that is not just any witch, in point of fact it is obviously Marvel’s own sexy super-heroine by night when she’s feeling sexy, attorney by Day — Jennifer Walters, the She-Hulk — dressed up as a witch for Halloween.
And something from deviantart, evidently from earlier that same day.
Having sex with superpowers is great. People with superpowers don’t need to have sex with drugs, that’s how good it is.
Here Jen is getting cunnilingus from some guy with a the ability to assume all the powers of the moon.
Here’s some other guy she sends home after having her way with him and doesn’t even get him a taxi although — get this — the guy is from out of town and doesn’t have his wallet on him
Although maybe, and I’m just throwing this out there, maybe Jennifer Walters is also a witch?!?
Nah, just kidding. But it would be pretty cool — a magic-using Hulk.
Call me, Kevin Feige (still mad though)
IG Agent 19 — As a bit of not commonly known music trivia when the devil, a gentleman of wealth and taste (although gentleman is perhaps a stretch where social standing is concerned), was sticking around St. Petersburg, this was the domicile he was sticking at (although back when he was sticking there it was known as Leningrad).
As you know the Devil has some big balls, no — not those kinds of balls — but the kinds of balls that AC/DC celebrated in their high society anthem
Big Balls
Well I’m upper upper class, high society
God’s gift to ballroom notoriety
And I always fill my ballroom, the event is never small
The social pages say I’ve got the biggest balls of all
I’ve got big balls, I’ve got big balls
They’re such big balls and they’re dirty big balls
And he’s got big balls and she’s got big balls
(But we’ve got the biggest balls of them all)
And my balls are always bouncing, my ballroom always full
And everybody comes and comes again
If your name is on the guest list, no one can take you higher
Everybody says I’ve got great balls of fire
I’ve got big balls, oh, I’ve got big balls
’N’ they’re such big balls, dirty big balls
And he’s got big balls, and she’s got big balls
(But we’ve got the biggest balls of them all)
Some balls are held for charity and some for fancy dress
But when they’re held for pleasure, they’re the balls that I like best
My balls are always bouncing to the left and to the right
It’s my belief that my big balls should be held every night
We’ve got big balls, we’ve got big balls
We’ve got big balls, dirty big balls
He’s got big balls, she’s got big balls
But we’ve got the biggest balls of them all
(We’ve got big balls, we’ve got big balls)
And I’m just itching to tell you about them
Oh we had such wonderful fun
Seafood cocktail, crabs, crayfish
(But we’ve got the biggest balls of them all)
That right there by the way shows how vulgar the Devil really is.
Imagine if Ravana, the 10-headed demon of the Rakshasas was to give a ball that was slightly smaller than that of the Devil’s. Well of course for the whole next high society season every time he shows up anywhere he has to put up with the devil talking about being wealthy and tasteful and having the biggest balls.
It’s the kind of thing that just makes a demon extremely anti-social and bitter.
Of course as well know the wife of Mikhail Bulgakov, Elena Sergeevna Shilovskaya, described a ball that she attended at the house of the American ambassador in Moscow
but which, on closer inspection was obviously one of these gigantic balls that the devil was in the habit of throwing all over the place like he was about something.
Why am I going on about this — well because of course the devil being the devil he just had to have some big balls when he was living in the St. Petersburg train station — why that’s his whole raison d’être (French, the devil’s favorite language aside from old Latin used here for effect)
Just imagine, the blitzkrieg was raging and there was some real odoriferous body stank going on, and he’s got a ball with all the high quality folks of hell and related environs showing up.
But the fact is the fellow just tries too hard, always showing off, and if he’s not throwing a loud obnoxious party himself, why he is showing up at other people’s parties uninvited and throwing off their mojo.
IG AGENT 77 — There are just so many darn devils, but luckily Illuminati Ganga keeps track of them all so you don’t need to — which means you should really subscribe to Illuminati Ganga and sign up for our Infernal Almanack.
One of our first publications of Demonology was prepared by IG Agent 157, the Demon Manual of Operations (De operatione dæmonum) which categorized the types of Demons that were available on the market at that time.
These were Leliurium, Aërial, Marine, Terrestrial,Subterranean, and Lucifugous — this classification was expanded in the 7th edition of the manual in 1409 with the Lanterne of Light model, mapping various famous devils to the area of human conduct over which they presided
- Lucifer: Pride
- Beelzebub: Envy
- Satan: Wrath
- Abaddon: Sloth
- Mammon: Greed
- Belphegor: Gluttony
- Asmodeus: Lust
This list was updated two years ago, although the newest version of the manual is only available to accredited members of Illuminati Ganga (note: we have information that a publicly available manual is being worked on by Agents 6, 18 and 33), and this new version has one notable new entry
8. Stan: Devil in charge of Procrastination and Social Media
STAN — BY WARHOL
Stan, now there’’s a guy you’d like to go have a beer with — which he will definitely want to go do as long as he has something else more urgent and important to do at the moment.
This article tracks recent developments on the Illuminati Ganga Twitter account, with extra exposition for Illuminati Ganga Agents 6, 77, and 19
Curation and Editorial work was done by IG Agent 86, as always
The Playlist for this article is
OTHER RESOURCES
As you will no doubt have noticed we reference tweets from the following people who are not members of Illuminati Ganga — check them out
There are some who call me…TIM @TimNoEgo
Co-founder High Times magazine, Former weed smuggler. Did time. ALL GODS ARE MYTHS Please send tips. I am really broke. $TimNoEgo
Culture Critic — @Culture_Crit
Tradition is not the worship of ashes, but the preservation of fire.
𝕮𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙 𝕯𝖗𝖆𝖛𝖊𝖓 — @CountExcelGuy
Metalhead/Vampyre/Eclectic/GreyWitch/IFSJ-T/Harleys/Mopars/GothHorror/Macabre/LHP
Other Articles of Interest in relation to the Agents involved in this article
