The Fox Den — A Bi-Weekly Newsletter of The Woodland
Issue 210 — Excitement At The Big Road
Well Folks, it’s been a pretty big couple of weeks here in the WoodLand and I’m here as always, your friend, The Fox, to tell you all about it.
Now before I start I just want to give a big shout out to Possum’s Old Time Gruel
Originally invented by Ol’ Mama Possum herself, back in the day, a modern porridge but filled with traditional tastiness!
News and Goings on
The ants found a picnic basket on a large blanket by the big mess of dandelions by the little crick, items in total:
half eaten cake, strawberry
a slice of salami and cheese!
Three Lemons, and an apple.
The wise old Owl that lives in the oak tree doesn’t speak much anymore, but his powers of observation are reputedly undiminished.
The clock that is hung on the center willow has a bird living inside it, which comes out and talks periodically — I myself have seen this wonder.
The Cormorant and The Stork have made peace regarding the nest building incident of last year, and are now the best of friends again.
Now the big thing I guess we all have been talking about the last little bit was the Big Race!
The big race being the one specifically between The Tortoise and The Hare!
Now you may not know this but a little bird told me the Hare was hanging at some notorious dens the night he announced a race, places where the folks maybe talk a bit louder than the lungs can back up and get all high and mighty when maybe they’re just short and shouty. That’s what the little bird said, I ain’t an expert.
And now I’ve heard also people say the Hare challenged the Tortoise and said the loser should leave the woodland, well that may be or even more likely it may not be, and I say this on behalf of my great but sadly departed friend the Hare that I would strongly caution people against spreading rumors they can’t necessarily back up!
Why sure on his behalf, this whole tale of him saying our mutual friend should leave the woodland would be hateful to his heart I warrant, to think that a friendly race should lead to enmity!
How friendly of a race was it, well thinkee here friends, when the Hare got tired and could not go on the Tortoise let him sit on the very edge of his car so that the cool fresh wind might revive him!
And to top it all of since Tortoise never goes to those kinds of low down establishments that our young Lepine friend was unfortunately drawn to well you just know there couldn’t ever have been any sort of binding contract made — imagine, claiming Hare was so stupid as to claim somebody should leave the woodland without a binding contract! Why it is downright defamatory! I have half a mind to sue on behalf of my dear departed friend and to open some sort of recreational center in his name from the proceeds of such a suit, to allow for young forest creatures to spend their time far away from the temptations of meadows or open pasture!
But anyway the race went great, everybody had a swell time, and afterwards to help spread around the enjoyment and yes, maybe even the feeling of camraderie and love that was in play, our friend and great benefactor to all woodland creatures, The Tortoise, gave out fizzy drinks and cheeses! Remember that?! Remember!? I bet you do!!
I sure bet I remember, and will probably ‘nough remember to my dying day.
Yes that’s right, just a few weeks ago we all had fizzy drinks and cheeses. That’s something to treasure!
Now on to some more recent and sad news, I have heard our young friend the Hare had some entanglements with Weasels — of what sort I am sure I wouldn’t know although it has been rumored that cabbage and corncobs have been mentioned — and here’s the sadness, these Weasels evidently did visit his warren, and took out their disputes on his hide.
Oh dear, to go from fizzy drinks and cheeses to Weasels and death in just a few short days — well, life certainly is an unsolvable mystery.
And even more sad — our friend the Tortoise has been so shocked by this news regarding his good friend and co-champion that he has left the woodlands for a couple weeks for a tour of quiet reflection in the canals of the north. Any sorts of legal questioning or interviews of The Tortoise can be directed to his representative, meaning me, during this time of meditative absence.
OK — this here seems like the end of the Fox Den for this week —and remember until next week:
ACORNS — You can get them from Squirrel at good rates!
Agent 71 claimed to get this article dropped on his head by a crow while walking in the park and looking at the ancient green brass statuary therein.
