M2E #1— Exploring who I am not
This is a post in an M2E (Month 2 Explore) series: a new approach to learning. In the month of May 2018 I want to explore how the not-self side of me influences my life — my decision making, my relationships, my health. The term “not-self” comes from Human Design, the “science of differentiation”. The goal of Human Design is to acquire self-knowledge and live the life that is uniquely yours. Key elements: Strategy and Authority.
I want to use the month of May to explore a side of myself of which Human Design predicts that I give a lot of authority to it, but that it is not me, and that it is basically the origin of many of the troubles in my life: my not-self.
For you to understand what I am talking about, I need to tell you a little bit about HD, but I will do that in a very unstructured manner. If you are interested in a quick introduction, you could find one here.
I came in contact with it about two years ago. You can get your chart (you can see mine on the left) for free on any HD website, so I did, and I became very curious what this whole colourful thing with all the numbers and words meant, so I got a reading and I read a lot of books about it.
Then I let it go. Other priorities surfaced. Until last September, when somebody new came into my life; I told her about it and I got interested in it again. It did not stop there. Due to the time that had passed, I got a totally different understanding of this knowledge, and I wanted to really feel what it means to “live your design”. That became all very real when I got a second reading, that deepened my understanding of how this machine that I call “I” functions. It is magical: if you accept that you function as you, without judgment, everything and everyone becomes so beautiful and perfect. It is just mechanics!
I will not go into all the details here, but I need to give some info. HD gives you the things that you can rely upon in your life in this body. If you look at the chart, look at the coloured centres, these are filled in and reliably for you.
The white centres are not reliable, but the mind tends to give a lot of authority to exactly those centres. This is what is called the “not-self”: we tend to try to rely on that which we are not.
Then, HD gives you Strategy and Authority. In my case (a 6/2 split definition Manifesting Generator) my Authority is my solar plex — emotional authority — and my Strategy is to wait (there is no truth in the now).
Where we learn to give authority to our mind, HD teaches us that the mind can never be your inner authority. Things you figure out by thinking can be very neat and beautiful, but they contain not necessarily your truth. In my case, my truth will come out of waiting, waiting and waiting some more, so that I will go through my emotional wave. If I do that, I will get clarity at a certain moment, and then I am ready to decide.
During this mind I want to get to know my three empty centres: head, ajna and heart. What behaviour is stimulated by them being empty? What happens when I succeed in following my strategy and authority? Where can I watch things going off the rails when I give my decision making to my mind? Or when I do not act according to the adage of waiting? Because for me: there is no truth in the now, I am spontaneous!
These posts will contain my exploration of the knowledge, combined with experiences in my daily life. Hope you will enjoy it as much as I will writing about it.
