I Think: Bad marriages can lead men to rape
Shashi Prabha Jain, homemaker, Ahmedabad
When incidents like rape happen, we tend to think it is always the girl’s fault, either because of her clothes or her behaviour. But in today’s time, when we see girls doing as well as — or better than — boys in education and at work, we cannot think this way. It is never only the girl’s fault. Men have also become devilish. We must teach them to respect their mothers and sisters.
Unfortunately, the media also presents the news in a gender-biased way. This is a huge problem since the audience’s notions are informed by the media. The media can do a lot for society if it presents the news in the right way. But it is not doing this. Simply chasing TRPs is very wrong.
Whatever the incident, the media should present as it is, without exaggeration. Exaggeration makes the wrong impression. These days there’s also this new trend on TV — one single piece of news is repeated throughout the day. When you watch something on repeat the entire day, every day, it gets stuck in your head. How does it affect us? Negatively, needless to say.
Our lifestyle today has changed drastically. Earlier, people did not venture out so much, and there were rules and restrictions in place. Of course, such incidents happened then too, but there was no way to broadcast the news nationwide. Also, certain extreme incidents happen now which they did not earlier, like the rape of five- and six-year-olds.What do I even call these? Madness. Degeneration. Who can we trust? We can’t even trust ours relatives.
Given this decline in our values, girls must control their clothing styles. However advanced one may be, men and women have their own bodily structures, and there are certain things that must be taken care of. If we don’t do that, then that’s wrong.
As for the rape of children, I cannot fathom why it happens. One reason could be non-fulfillment of physical needs. Marriages today face many issues and because of dissatisfaction with their wives, men look to fulfill their needs outside. And once they begin looking outside, they are capable of doing anything.
I think every girl must learn some form of self-defence and keep things like pepper spray at all times. If travelling at night, precautions should be followed. Girls also must have the right to act if such a situation arises, and the courts and society must support them. If even three such cases arise, and the girl steps up and takes the necessary measures, these incidents may decrease.
But in all of this, parents are the most responsible. According to my experience, if a girl’s relationship and communication with her parents is strong, there is no way anything can go wrong with her. If there is a communication gap, she will hide things from her mother. And wherever there are lies, such incidents tend to occur more.
I am completely in favour of the death penalty, whether the victim is below the age of 12 or above. If the courts sentence three or four guilty people to death on an immediate basis, the rape cases will probably go down. The culprits must be punished immediately. If it is taking even six months, it is too long.
