Mastering the Art of Blowing Water

Eur Ing Hong Wai Onn
Management Matters
Published in
6 min readJul 1, 2024

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“吹水” (chui shui) is a colloquial Cantonese expression. Literally translated as “blowing water,” it refers to engaging in casual conversation or light chatter, often without a specific purpose. The phrase vividly captures the scene of lively discussion, with words flowing like sprays of water.

Photo credit: isayildiz

While “blowing water” might seem like a trivial activity, often dismissed as relaxed discussions about minor matters meant solely for passing the time, it is actually a highly valuable social tool when mastered effectively. Many people underestimate its significance, viewing it as a waste of time. However, when used tactfully, “blowing water” conveys a more down-to-earth and intimate feeling than simply saying “chatting.” It serves as an effective way to connect with others, exchange ideas, and build meaningful relationships. Here are four key benefits of engaging in this seemingly idle practice:

Socializing and Building Your Network

Studies show that many people feel anxious about speaking up in social gatherings, especially when meeting new acquaintances. “Blowing water” is an excellent way to initiate conversation and bond with unfamiliar individuals. Whether you’re at a social event, a professional gathering, or simply meeting someone new at a café, this relaxed banter helps you comfortably ease into discussions, facilitating the establishment of new connections. These light-hearted exchanges can pave the way for deeper connections, broadening both your social and professional circles. At the very least, it helps break the silence at the table, preventing any awkwardness.

Making Yourself Visible

In today’s fast-paced world, making yourself visible to others is crucial. According to a report by the Harvard Business Review, visibility in social and professional settings significantly impacts career advancement and personal growth. In a large group of people, it can be challenging for everyone to remember you. However, “blowing water” helps you stand out and be remembered. When you frequently initiate or participate in these chats, people start to recognize you as approachable and friendly. This visibility can open doors to new opportunities, whether in your personal or professional life, as people are more likely to think of you when opportunities arise.

Reducing Stress

“Blowing water” can significantly reduce stress in various environments. Whether in the workplace, at home, or in social settings, engaging in light-hearted chatter creates a more relaxed atmosphere. These interactions provide a mental break from more serious tasks, allowing you to recharge and return to your responsibilities with a refreshed mindset. Additionally, sharing a laugh or an interesting story can improve your mood and overall well-being. This simple tactic, when handled well, can be especially useful in diffusing tension during high-pressure situations, such as during a coffee break in a war room.

Bolstering Team Spirit

In a team setting, “blowing water” can play a crucial role in strengthening camaraderie and cooperation. A survey by Gallup found that employees who feel connected to their coworkers are more engaged and productive. Instead of formal discussions, these relaxed interactions among team members foster trust and rapport, facilitating more effective cooperation. When team members feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and ideas in a relaxed manner, it fosters a more inclusive and supportive environment. This, in turn, enhances teamwork and productivity, as individuals feel more connected and motivated to work together towards common goals.

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It is evidence that “blowing water” can be an invaluable skill for building connections and fostering relationships. Whether you’re at a social gathering, networking event, or professional meeting, mastering the art of “blowing water” can help you leave a lasting impression and create meaningful interactions. Here are some key tips to consider:

Choose the Right Topics and Lead the Conversation

When initiating “blowing water,” it’s essential to choose topics that are relevant and interesting to the other person. Start with light-hearted subjects or shared interests to break the ice and build rapport. These could include recent news, sports events, new movies, or song releases. Be mindful of sensitive issues such as politics and religion to avoid discomfort. Once you’ve captured their interest, gently steer the conversation toward your desired topic by asking open-ended questions or sharing related anecdotes. For example, if you’re at a business event with a new acquaintance, you might start by discussing the latest advancements in smartphones, highlighting the key features of the newest models. As the conversation progresses, you can subtly transition to more focused topics, such as the impact of technology on productivity. This gradual shift allows for a natural flow of conversation, eventually leading to relevant business discussions.

Share Your Own Experience and Prompt Conversation

If you have trouble finding suitable topics to start “blowing water,” sharing your own experiences or insights can be a great alternative. This approach helps you confidently open the conversation because these are your own stories. The topics don’t need to be serious; sometimes, sharing jokes or poking fun at yourself can be enough. A study by Harvard Business School found that people are more engaged and interested when they learn from others’ real experiences. Most importantly, be authentic and genuine in your sharing to establish trust and credibility. You don’t want them to discover inconsistencies in your stories later on. After sharing your experiences, ask thought-provoking questions that encourage others to share their perspectives and experiences, fostering collaboration and mutual exchange. For example, when meeting new business connections, you could start by recounting a challenging situation you faced, adding humor to lighten the mood, and then explain how you overcame it. This not only kick-starts the “blowing water” session but also provides a bit of an introduction about yourself.

Listen More Before Speaking

Sometimes, you may find yourself in a conversation where the topics are unfamiliar to you. Don’t worry; you’re not alone, and no one knows everything. In these situations, start by actively listening and giving your full attention to others. Look for opportunities to gently contribute to the discussion. You don’t necessarily need to continue on the same topic or answer questions directly; instead, you can skillfully steer the conversation in a different direction without revealing your lack of knowledge. This approach requires some tact. For example, if the conversation is about cryptocurrency and you’re not well-versed in the subject, you could ask a thought-provoking question like, “What would happen if the world banned cryptocurrency?” This can shift the discussion and invite new perspectives. You might follow up with, “I imagine it would be chaotic and face significant public pushback. Speaking of financial changes, it reminds me of my early days working in a completely different industry where we faced a massive regulatory overhaul…”

Body language plays a crucial role during “blowing water,” as it can communicate confidence, openness, and receptiveness. Photo credit: kali9

Body Language Is Equally Important

Regardless of how you start or continue a “blowing water” session, nonverbal cues — such as facial expressions, gestures, and posture — play a significant role. Pay attention to your body language during “blowing water,” as it can convey confidence, openness, and receptiveness. No one likes engaging with someone who seems robotic. For example, maintaining an open posture with arms uncrossed signals sincerity. Making eye contact and smiling gently shows you’re happy with what you’re sharing. When teasing yourself, it’s completely okay to face-palm gently to signal you’re genuinely embarrassed at that moment. A study by University of California, Los Angeles found that up to 93% of communication effectiveness is determined by nonverbal cues. Often, appropriate body language can leave a lasting impact on people’s minds.

The Art of Blowing Water

In conclusion, mastering the art of “blowing water” can be an invaluable skill for building connections and fostering relationships, whether at social gatherings, networking events, or professional meetings. While it may be seen as a less important skill and sometimes perceived as a waste of time, effectively “blowing water” by choosing the right topics, sharing your own experiences, actively listening, and being mindful of your body language can create engaging and meaningful conversations that leave a lasting impression and enhance your social interactions.

Eur Ing Hong Wai Onn, a chartered chemical engineer and a Fellow of the Institution of Chemical Engineers and the Royal Society of Chemistry. He is also the author of “A Chemical Engineer in the Palm Oil Milling Industry”. Make sure you check out this other interesting article:

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Eur Ing Hong Wai Onn
Management Matters

A chartered chemical engineer and a Fellow of the Institution of Chemical Engineers and the Royal Society of Chemistry. Website at https://hongwaionn.com/