You Don’t Know Everything (and that’s OK)
Humility is often overlooked as an essential trait in a leader
Inspirational, courageous, innovative, confident, intelligent. If you imagined a stereotypical leader, she would likely possess some or all of these qualities. Humility wouldn’t even break the top ten for most people.
Perhaps this is the case because we have the wrong idea about humility. We think humility is incongruent with courage or confidence. We think humility means that we always have to give in to other people. If that’s what we think, then we’re missing out on the importance of humility in a leader.
If you are the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.
Confucius uttered those words thousands of years ago, but they would be right at home in a 21st-century business best-seller. It’s solid advice whether you are starting out in your first management position or are already at an executive level. When you surround yourself with people smarter than you are, you have the potential to learn from them.
Without humility, though, the benefit of surrounding yourself with smart people is lost.
If you think you already know the answer, you’ll never seek outside advice. If you think you know the best direction, you’ll never consult with others. If you think a leader can never utter, “I don’t know,” you’ll never be able to learn from the wisdom of others.
Humility is not about debasing yourself. It isn’t about pretending you are lower than you really are.
Humility is thinking accurately of yourself. A leader should be confident in his gifts and knowledge, but he should also recognize his limits.
When you admit, first to yourself, that you don’t know everything, you free yourself to learn from others. No matter what position you hold in the org chart, you can always learn from the people around you.
Humility, while often overlooked, can actually be one of the qualities that distinguish a good leader from a great leader.
When you lead with humility, everyone’s strengths can be utilized
Humility is important because it allows the strengths of others to be appreciated. Think about your own strengths, and then think about the strengths of others in your organization. Chances are good that everyone brings something unique to the table. When you lead with humility, you’re able to recognize the abilities and potential contributions of others.
Nothing screams insecurity like a leader who insists on doing everything himself. Leading with humility actually requires incredible confidence. A humble leader recognizes she might not have the right skill set for a certain task, so she recruits a member of her team to do it.
You might have someone on your team (or in the organization, or access to a consultant) who specializes in an area where you’re weak. Rather than feeling threatened by that, you can embrace that and invite that person to the table.
When you lead with humility, you become more authentic
People today crave authenticity. When you lead with humility, you are able to admit when you don’t know something. You don’t have to project a false sense of confidence. Confidence is good, but false confidence can come back to bite you.
How trustworthy is a person who never listens to the advice of others, especially when that person turns out to be egregiously wrong? False confidence, when it ends up being wrong, destroys trust.
I’ve never been afraid to be honest when I don’t know the answer to something. For a long time, though, I thought this made me less of a leader. I thought this made people question my abilities. I’ve discovered quite the opposite.
Admitting, “I don’t know,” and then going out to find the answer, or consulting with someone else, creates authenticity. It builds trust. It shows that you know your own limitations but are willing to push past them to discover the answer. It also gives your team permission to admit the same.
When you lead with humility, you become better every day
It requires humility to admit that you have room to improve. If you already believe you know everything you need to know, or that you’ve sufficiently developed your skills, you won’t keep growing.
When you think accurately of yourself, and invite others to give you feedback, you become aware of your limitations. Pay attention to those and invest extra effort in developing yourself there.
Humility and confidence go hand in hand. Realizing you have limitations, even significant ones, doesn’t have to be demoralizing. It can actually inspire you to pursue growth in those areas.
What does a humble leader look like?
A humble leader knows her strengths and her limitations. She leads confidently from her strengths and invites others to fill the gap when they are better suited.
A humble leader builds strong teams. He isn’t threatened by the talents of others, even if those talents exceed his own. He wants the organization to succeed, so he assembles the best team for the job.
A humble leader asks for help. Leading a team or an organization is not a solo act and asking for help is not a sign of weakness.
A humble leader gets better every day. Admitting you have room to grow inspires you to keep running toward the finish line.
How do you become more humble?
If humility feels threatening to you, start privately. You don’t have to broadcast your weaknesses to the whole team. If you’ve never uttered, “I don’t know,” in front of others before, you don’t have to start there immediately.
Start by taking an honest look at yourself. What are your strengths? A humble leader still acknowledges where she’s strong. Don’t stop at the strengths, though. What are your limitations? Be honest, you’re only talking to yourself at this point.
Once you know some of your limitations, you’ve got a natural launchpad. Pick one that you want to spend the next three weeks developing. Read articles and books about it on your own, and then take the brave step of asking someone else. Think about someone you know who is strong in that area and ask for advice.
As you become more comfortable sitting with your own limitations, it’ll start to be easier to admit those to others. The next step is harder. When you have a project coming up that involves one of your limitations, ask someone on your team to step up and help. Admit to them that you aren’t as strong as you’d like to be and really appreciate their skills.
The more comfortable you become with your limitations, the easier it gets to admit those to others and start asking for help. Taking these steps toward leading with humility will be better for you, better for your team, and better for your organization.
It’s never too late to start learning from the people who are smarter than you.
